1993-01-05-Coming Materializations

Session

Opening

WELMEK: This is your teacher, Welmek. First I want you to know that all of us who are gathered here with you this evening have joined in your prayer for those you have petitioned for. We believe that the energy that we can add to what you have given will mightily enhance your petitions.

We are encouraged to see so many of you join us this evening. We, as you, are constantly learning as new techniques are unfolded within all of the groups across this world. We are excited as to the many developments that continue to happen, diversity of personalities that continue to come to this planet, and the amount of love and mercy that continues to flood, not only your world, but all of the worlds that have been isolated by the rebellion.

Before we turn this meeting over to you, I have been asked to make a statement. On behalf of Gabriel, I want to invite all of you gathered here this evening and those who were not able to attend to come to the April materialization. You will not be disappointed. We have, as you know, petitioned Michael, and he has granted this.

Lesson

Many things will happen between this evening and that time. Listen, for all of you here have someone or someones assigned to you. You may or may not yet be fully aware of their presence, but it is our intention to make you aware, even to the point of some communication before the materialization takes place. Continue your practices as you have been instructed by your teachers. Listen, feel the love of the Father, and if you have yet to receive communication, it will be forthcoming. Do not be anxious, be relaxed, be of good cheer.

You are blessed more than what you realize, but soon you will begin to realize. As the materialization takes place, your lives will begin to change. That which you have read from your text will have more meaning, will have more depth. You will begin to see the spirit within each other as you begin to see the spirits who have only to this point in time spoken to you through other humans. It will be a time of great joy for all of us. It will be wonder and excitement for you to be able to see one from, as you say, the other side; and it will be a time of great joy and excitement for us as we will be able share ourselves more fully with you. I look forward to this event with great anticipation.

HAM: My friends, this is Ham. I have petitioned Welmek to speak for just a moment this evening. I know your agenda is full. The last time I spoke to you my message was sobering. After having spent time with you and observing you during the meeting, it became apparent that some of you were disconcerted by my words and mannerisms. I want you to know how much I love all of you. You do not know me as well as your teacher. This is understood and accepted. But I want you to know with all of your heart as well as your mind that my purpose, my intention, for the mannerism and the words that occurred was to encourage you, not to disappoint you, not to make you feel less than what you feel.

There is much excitement ahead of you. I want you to be excited about the anticipation, but I also want you to realize that in order to build your foundation of faith which you all seek, it is necessary to do what your teacher has asked you to do. I know that you do your best. I encourage you to continue to try and do the same. Be not dismayed when you find days that you seem to fall short. Always look to tomorrow when today is not fulfilling.

Michael is with us all. I wish to thank you for listening to me this evening; and again, I want you to know how pleased I am to be amongst you. It is an honor for me to be able to speak to humans; for even though I may be more evolved, you have something which I lack. Together we will come to know each other more fully. Thank you for this opportunity.

ANDREA: This is Andrea. I, too, have petitioned your teacher to speak just briefly. The time for healing draws nearer. There are those of you who seek this sincerely. I want you to know that if you do, I have been given permission to reinforce the energy which is realized through you, that energy which flows through you into another. Much can be done in this regard, and we are more fully prepared to begin now than ever before. Many things, as you have been told, have been happening on our side. Healing is one of these areas which has been given more of a "green light".

Do not feel compelled to be involved in healing, for there will be many tasks that need to be assigned. I would suggest that those of you who are already involved continue. Those of you that are not, be prepared, if you are willing, to be given other assignments.

I, too, like my brother Ham, am pleased to be able to interact with you. It is quite remarkable to watch your behavior. You cannot see me, you cannot see Michael, you cannot see anything, really, beyond your limited scope of vision. Yet your faith moves me deeply. There are times that the love that swells within my heart is overflowing for you because I know, or at least I think I know, what it must be like to love the Father and yet not be able to see Him. You are fortunate, and you are all loved very much. Thank you.

WELMEK: This is Welmek again. Needless to say, we are all moved by you. You inspire us. You encourage us. When we see in you the willingness to move forward, to have faith in the Father, to believe in our teachings and to even put them into practice, validates the existence of God, Himself. As my brothers and sisters say, we may see more than you, we may know more than you, but at times, your faith inspires us. Glory be to our Father in heaven, for in Him all things exist. We are all part of a big family, my friends, and I promise you tonight, there will come a time when you and I will all share together, face-to-face.

After your discussion this evening, I would like to make a few comments and then we will conclude this meeting. All of us gathered are looking forward to your discussion. I have been permitted to tell you that what transpires here this evening is being broadcast throughout our system.

Dialogue

M: Thanks a lot Welmek..(laughter)

GROUP: Whoa..turn up the pressure a little bit..(laughter) You're on the air....

WELMEK: My associates feel the warmth and the love from all of you, and we, too, smile. But as we have told you tonight, as what Ham said, you have something that we do not. You have faith beyond sight. Most of us, I should rephrase, all of us were born on worlds unlike yours. Your faith truly does inspire us, and for that we are all grateful. Begin your discussion.

MARVA: Thank you Welmek. You know, I took this with the attitude of trying to figure out why Welmek wanted integrity as one of his five top things for character building. After I got into it, I wish I'd gotten out of it, because believe me, what I thought it was is not what it is. What I would like to do in the very beginning is, since there's not a whole bunch here tonight, is I'd like to go around the room and ask each one of you what you thought integrity was; and then I want to go through and tell you what I found and how we came to that conclusion. Would that be all right?

Q: I guess integrity for me is acting, living your life with what you believe is correct, not doing something because you're afraid you're going to get in trouble or because you might get caught, or whatever, but what you really feel is true. I was thinking about this earlier tonight, and on the movie with Billy Crystal where they do the cattle thing, you know, and one of his friends asks him, "If you could have an affair with a woman and your wife would never find out, never in a million years find out, would you do it?" And he said "No, because I would know." That, to me, kind of summed up my idea of integrity.

Q: I always thought, before I was given this assignment from Marva (laughter) that integrity was simply a characteristic or a trait that shows respect and living true to one's morals and beliefs, just simply.

Q: I think of it as keeping yourself intact. When you have integrity, you never let..you never sacrifice part of yourself, so whether it's your intellectual honesty, your ethics, whatever it might be, you stay true to yourself, your higher values, and you keep yourself intact. You never let those go, you never sacrifice them to sacrifice a part of that wholeness, that feeling that you have.

Q: I had a similar feeling of being, as Mike mentioned, it occurred to me that one reason forgiveness has been emphasized is that that is a way to restore ourselves to our own image of what our wholeness, of what our integrity is.

Q: I've always thought of it in the sense of being moral uprightness, where you know what the right thing is, and you enact it in your life, really, regardless of what people may think of you. I think it encompasses a sense of moral courage, and what Michael said, that sense that you do the right thing because you know in your heart that that's the right way to do it.

Q: I've always thought of it as that part inside that, where your highest values are, that's absolutely unshakeable. It's as though it's on bedrock instead of quicksand.

Q: Well, prior to your assignment (laughter),

M: He was on my hit list, too, guys.

Q: . .I thought of it as forthrightness, kind of what Donna and Michael said, that you don't compromise your values for anything, that you maintain your integrity.

Q: I've always thought of it as maintaining your actions as true to your moral values. You said it better, I like your way. (laughter) Perhaps a more concrete way of bringing it down would be just as Larry said to me last week, it felt good to run into an old hippie, to know that at that time and still today, that's exactly the way we feel.

Q: I would agree with everyone else. It's a consistency of behavior that's exemplified by the characteristics that we discussed last week of honesty, and love, responsibility.

Q: I guess like maybe an example might be if you stood up for something because you wanted to, not because you thought someone else would want you to.

Q: I would have to agree with that, standing up for what you believe in whether it's popular or not.

Q: I guess I agree with what's been said so far. One thing that's in my mind as we're discussing it is, I used to believe that once you gained integrity, or you built it, it wasn't something that you would lose or slip from. But I feel in my life that that has happened at one point, and it's been a major conflict for me for years. It was kind of like the stability in life during hard times that kept me going; it helped me have my faith. I think I lost a lot of faith in myself when I turned away from it. It wasn't even for a huge amount of time, but it's been something that hasn't been resolved easily for me.

Q: I agree with that, that it's not only living up to what you believe in; but if you say you're going to do it, you do it.

Q: I've always thought of integrity as just being honest with yourself in all the challenges that you have in life.

Q: I, before this assignment, (laughter) I always thought of integrity as what my dad used to tell me when I was a little boy. He was always concerned that he wanted me to grow up honestly and told me how important it was to be honest and told me how a man is only as good as his word. So I've always thought of integrity as simply living honestly and without deceit with your relationship with yourself.

Q: Being honest in what you believe and what you were taught and standing up for it and not backing down regardless of what people say to you or what people do to you. Always stand up for what you believe in.

Q: I always thought of it as the quality of a human that allowed him to live to the highest ideals that they could conceive and maintain true to that.

Q: Integrity to me is the internal balance and cohesiveness that keeps you from straying from your values. It gives you the ability to be true to yourself and courage to live by your values and also the ability to give that right to other people.

Q: Ditto what everybody else has said, but I do want to add that it's not just standing up to your own moral values, but standing up to the right moral values.

Q: (words lost)...steadfastness.

M: Well, you know, when I was coming up, before I joined the Mormon church, I was pretty wild. I had a teacher, his name was John. He took me aside and he taught me that integrity was something that was to be valued. He valued it higher than anything else you could put in front of yourself. So what he did was he gave me several things that he himself had done. It was a challenge; I did not know it at the time. He told me that no matter what was done to me, I could not tell what he had told me.

And so he set it up so that I had to go through my home teacher and be challenged on what John had told me. That didn't do any good because I wouldn't tell him what I knew. And then they put me up to the bishop and his two counselors, and I still wouldn't tell them, not knowing that I was being set up the whole time. From there I went to the state president and their two counselors, from there to a higher one; and then they brought in somebody from Salt Lake. Well, I finally got tired of it and blew up at all of them.

I found out ten years after that that that's what he had done. He wanted me to know what integrity was. And I learned it. But it's not what I learned over this lesson. Believe me, it wasn't.

What I would like to do is...I have 3 or 4 different dictionaries and I combined them all. The ones that say "integrity, l through 3 are the current ones. lA,B,C is the one that's 150 years old. So that's where I came up with "rigid adherence to a code of behavior". And you know, it took me a long time to find it, because we've got several dictionaries. I had to go back to one that's 150 years old to find this, what I believed in.

Dave, do you have yours in front of you? Will you read the first two definitions of integrity?

D: A quality or state of being complete; unbroken condition; wholeness; entirety. 2. The quality or state of being unimpaired; perfect condition, soundness.

M: The other four I'll read: The quality or state of being of sound moral principle, uprightness, honest, sincerity. Rigid adherence to a code of behavior or probity. Probity means to be complete with integrity. The state of being unimpaired, soundness, completeness, unity. And the synonym for it was honesty. And when I went down through here, I wrote down all the synonyms on the bottom of it and most of them go back to the word honesty. And if you look at last week's list of 23, they're all in there, all under honesty and all under integrity.

I put the word "integra" in here because that is where the word "integrity" came from; and I asked Peter, who is my philosopher of my family, to tell where it came from and how we got the word "integrity".

P: "Integra" is the old Latin word which means number or whole, one. And that comes from Pythagoras and the Pythagoreans. Pythagoras was a Greek philosopher from 525 to 500 B.C. and Plato studied under him. What you have is "whole" equals "one". A number is the number that you're using regardless of what that number happens to be. That number could be a l, it could be a 3, it could be a 4, but it's a number. One is that specific number or it's that specific item, and that item might be plural. Whole is the entire number that you're dealing with. This is an entire group of people, and that's the number we're dealing with here. Or it's the item, the group we have here. Those are the three ways that they looked at that word, integra.

The reason that the number is important, is that the (?) school of philosophers just before the Pythagoreans believed in matter, but they had no way of distinguishing matter. Everything was one gray form, gray mass; but there was no means for distinguishing between a particular item. The Pythagoreans came along and decided that you have to have a way of limiting; you have to have form. The only way you can create any limit is to give it a number. So that you give each thing a number; and the only way to really achieve any harmony, any whole, is to give proper limits. And those proper limits are expressed in numbers again. So it came back to numbers. And musically, the only way to gain harmony was to come up with numbers. Music and medicine are the two arts that they used.

M: Pythagoras said that integrity meant wholeness, and so therefore they considered that as a...they include that not only with God, with themselves, with their family, with the music, with whatever else you want to say, the word "whole" came from integrity, and that's how we got it.

But the reason that it came up here origin (?) code, was that back England in I think the 1500s when people started beginning to read, and they came up with the fact that they had to have some word in there to control the people. And so they used the word "integrity" as the word "whole" so that they could make it as a code which to them meant a rigid code in the army, etc. so that the people could be controlled. That's how the word "integrity" came around, as we know it as being..adhered to a code.

What I would like to do is...I asked Welmek yesterday in a private session what he thought integrity was. And he gave some sort of thing on it last week, but I couldn't find it. He said "To me, integrity represents the trueness of a person. It encompasses honesty, sincerity, but there is also strength, steadfastness, I suppose. Like most of the terms on the list, it relates to or encompasses a number of those. I chose it to represent several others that I admire, and it seemed to include more of them than one of them would have included. Do you understand?"

So after reading all of this, I came up with I guess a new definition for integrity. It's something that I honestly feel now. I wasn't sure about it until about an hour ago before I got here. I came up with...integrity is a maturation process, because I do feel that integrity is a process. It's something that's done on a daily basis, step by step, decision by decision, whether it be right or wrong, to unite into a foundation of oneness, completeness, and we said physicalness. Completeness, physical and wholeness are spiritual, emotional and intellectual being with our Thought Adjuster, Christ Michael and our Father, because all of us have to grow on a daily basis toward our Thought Adjuster, toward Christ Michael and toward the Father. Does everybody agree with those steps?

What I did was, I went to the Urantia Book and I listed all the ones that I went through, and took five of them that I took everybody could build from. I asked Bob to take divine integrity.

B: Well, the first thing I did when she gave me this assignment was to get a handle on what the dictionary said. I have this Random House dictionary which is 2,000 pages, a hernia, but it had three definitions, the first of which is I feel is the more common use of the word today. The first one was: adherence to moral and ethical principles, soundness of moral character, honesty. That was the first definition.

The second definition kind of fits with what Marva has from her listings. The second definition is: the state of being whole or undiminished, as to preserve the integrity of.. And the third definition was: the sound, unimpaired or perfect condition, such as the integrity of a ship's hull.

Then I went to the reference that Marva gave me from page 35, the reference being the only reference where divine integrity was used. And here's the quote around which it was used. '"The Father has life in himself, and this life is eternal life." Throughout the eternal ages it has been the Father who "gives to all life." There is infinite perfection in the divine integrity. "I am the Lord; I change not."' Now some of these were quotes from the Bible in the same paragraph.

When Welmek discussed integrity in building character, I feel that he was referring to this first definition that I found, the adherence to moral and ethical principles, soundness of moral character, honesty. I think it encompassed a lot of the 23 or whatever items that we came up with last week. It is my opinion or assumption that the reference here on page 35 is to the divine integrity takes on a definition of the other two, that is, the state of being whole or undiminished, a sound or perfect condition. I think that's what is being referred to here in this section. So I don't think, unless I'm wrong in this, I feel that integrity here is not the same integrity that we're using in Welmek's...

M: Do you feel that divine integrity is something that we will eventually get to?

B: I think we will get to some degree of divine integrity.

M: But not in this life.

B: I don't think it's possible to get too much in this life...but yes, I would assume that eventually there would be some, that we will grow in integrity as our knowledge grows and our experience grows and we grow closer to the Father.

D: It occurred to me that maybe integrity is a synonym that would have been in earlier times better used, more commonly used for righteousness and that's what Bob has (?). You just don't hear that in the 20th century, very often, but it's probably very close.

M: Larry, you have personal integrity.

L: Going along with what everyone else has spoken about, I found a couple of things that came to add a little more along the lines of personal integrity besides just honesty. The word "honor" seems to add an implication of a higher-mindedness or sense of allegiance to one's own standards. These are not my words. It's something I found that gave it an added dimension to simple honesty. I think to paraphrase Shakespeare..it's a quote from Hamlet: "To thine own self be true, and it must follow as the night the day thou can not be false to any man." I think that that kind of sums it up for me.

Integrity encompasses a little more than just honesty or honor or all these other things. It kind of includes a lot of qualities together in that sense to me.

K: I like the word "honor". I haven't really heard that but I like that word.

L: These words seem to have fallen out of common usage, probably for a good reason.

K: I can remember as a student that they would say "You're on your honor now" you know; and you don't hear that.

S: At our office we have an "honor" box. You put your change in and take a piece of candy. I guess you could take the whole box.

M: If there isn't anything else, Mark, you had spiritual integrity?

M: Okay. This is just a little paragraph here that I came up with. Webster defines integrity as "being of sound principle, maintaining honesty and sincerity, and a state of being complete or whole". Of course, spiritual is "being of divine influence, entailing the intellect and the will of the soul". Therefore, when we talk about spiritual integrity, what do we mean?

I believe that our spiritual development entails our experiences and how we relate these experiences to our own spirit values. Our realization of truths, divine and moral, build our character and enable us to mature and progress. As our spiritual beliefs become living faith, how we maintain our sincerity and loyalty to these beliefs indeed define our spiritual integrity. The more whole-heartedly and honestly we live and practice our faith and values, the more we become like the Father. And of course, the more we become like the Father, the more complete and whole we are. This is determined significantly by our spiritual integrity.

I would also like to add that Marva gave me a reference in the book. When I looked at that reference, it said that pride is the most dangerous thing to a human's spiritual integrity. Pride and egotism.

D: I think that last comment you made is consistent with what, I believe it was Michael, asked Welmek one time, what was the one most devastating about human nature that kept us from the Father, or whatever. But Welmek's response was basically that, was concentration or self-centeredness, the ego, and that seems to be obviously what the teachers are trying to do for us. It seems that spiritual integrity is their primary focus. It seems very consistent.

S: It's one thing to take pride in your achievements and another thing to be prideful in a way that keeps you from growing.

D: It's like "Americans are better than Germans", you know.

S: Pride to the point of arrogance.

D: The book said that Lucifer's downfall was the pride.

K: I think that one thing that I got from what you said was that it was an active process. So many people say "I have faith, I believe." but they don't live it. So I think spiritual integrity also entails living of your faith.

S: To quote Benjamin Franklin: "If I ever become truly humble, I'll be immensely proud of myself."

M: Okay, if there's nothing else, Stan has intellectual integrity.

S: Actually, Marilyn and I both have that, and she's got the first part. (laughter)

M: On intellectual integrity, on page 1433, Jesus is quoted in the Urantia Book as saying: "The true teacher maintains his intellectual integrity by ever remaining a learner." Now thanks to Bob's computer, another place in the Urantia Book was found to discuss intellectual integrity on page 1114. The reference here refers to those who do not intellectual integrity "Moral cowards never achieve high planes of philosophic thinking; it requires courage to invade new levels of experience and to attempt the exploration of unknown realms of intellectual living." Stan will discuss the four phases of the evolution of the religious philosophy which shows the various degrees of intellectual integrity.

S: The four phases can describe you may know and can also describe for you the different evolutional phases one may travel through in attaining true intellectual integrity. In the first phase, such a person in this experience may become merely conformative, resigned to submission to tradition and authority. This type of person wants to go along with society.

In the second phase, such a person may be satisfied with slight attainments, just enough to stabilize the daily living and therefore becomes early arrested on such an adventitious level.

In the third phase, such a person may progress to the level of logical integrity, intellectual integrity, but there stagnates in consequence of cultural bondage, social dictates.

But in the fourth phase, which we all are hopefully shooting for, such a person attains freedom from all conventional and traditional handicaps and dares to think, act and live honestly, loyally, fearlessly and truthfully with true intellectual integrity.

D: That's interesting. A lot of people have integrity, but it's just very narrow. They don't include the elements of spirituality in that self-concept.

K: It's kind of like they just go with the flow, they conform to society and they don't anything that's bad; but they don't do anything that's really good either. They just kind of...

S: We probably all know people like this that are in a certain phase.

G: It seems like a matter of searching your own mind to see what the boundaries might be or if there are any.

S: It reminds of one person, a co-worker, that I talked to for a number of years about the Urantia Book; and he was very interested. But he was also afraid because it was something out of the realm of fundamentalism that he was used to. While he was really intrigued with what he heard, he seemed to light up when I would tell him things out of the Urantia Book, he nevertheless would never take that step. To me, that's a part of intellectual integrity.

B: For good or bad.

S: Well, that's a part of not being intellectually honest with yourself because if you're afraid to search for truth because you're afraid of what the consequences of that might be...

B: But by the same token, he's very steadfast in what he believes, so he has a wholeness that could go either way...

M: But he was listening in the beginning.

K: If he was really interested in the book...

S: Yes, he was.

K: And then he turned away from it.

S: Yes. He was really inspired, but his fear was continuing.

S: To me, and I think integrity falls under this too, is the person, in a negative sense or whatever, is the person who will stand up for his beliefs, but are not willing to at least look at someone else's beliefs for fear that is will challenge their own beliefs...

K: Or not listen to them. I saw a program today. I didn't really agree with the people who were on the left, you know, they had a certain way of thinking. But then there was this guy on the right who came out and just attacked. He didn't listen to what they said and he had his own mind; and he may have learned something if he would have listened to what these people said. Not that he had to totally agree with them, but because he didn't listen he didn't grow.

M: Let me ask you all this then. How long did it take each one of us to become a Urantia reader? It took me three years, almost four years now. And I'd been in this group a year and a half before I even in the last six months started reading the book. Period. So my integrity stood with my church and what I believed in until I could see where it was better for me to change.

K: But you were open enough to listen and get to that point.

M: It's like you're exploring a new level of integrity. For instance, you talk about the guy that Stan talks about, yes, he's whole with himself where he's at, but he's also on a plane where he's not going to advance. He's going to maintain that state. So I think part of the intellectual integrity that Stan talks about is that willingness to go up another level, to broaden oneself and be open enough to further explanation and further understanding of whatever the concept is that you're talking about.

D: I think it takes courage to allow yourself to have faith in your sense that you know what's right. Many people are so hounded by their fear that (?).

L. It seems like it would take more courage to leave your present faith and journey off into something that's totally new as far as major new concepts than it would be for someone who had a foundation in a given religion because you don't have anything to lose in that situation. You have everything to gain.

M: I just think it's the whole reason why there's four phases to it, so that as you progresses along, you're in the second, then in the third and then the final stage. You can't go from one to the other end all at once.

D: I don't think we ever get fully to the other end. There's maybe a metaphor would be a container, as a way of thinking about it. We take in too much, we don't have the spine, the inner organization to tie it all together and have a sense of integrity, so kind of reach a plateau where we can begin to pull it all together. Then we go from there to the larger container.

M: That brings us around to the emotions, and Michael has the feeling/emotional integrity.

M: Well, what came to my mind as I thought about this is basically the discussion that we had on feeling God's love. Earlier tonight it was mentioned that we think of intellectual courage and keep coming up with all of these things that are part of that wholeness and somebody mentioned, what's the glue? Well, to me the glue is that feeling of the Father's love, because as long as you feel that, you stay glued in those other things. They stay intact, they stay part of your wholeness more easily as long as you feel that. We talked about that night, when you react to emotion, what do you do? You let some of that integrity go. You give away some of that wholeness, that feeling of that love, and you lose some of your integrity. And so, in order to keep that wholeness and that feeling of being intact, you want always to be centered around the Father's love, to be the glue that keeps that faith, the intellectual honesty, all of these things together. This is kind of the glue, so to speak, that keeps all the different aspects of integrity together.

M: What I'd like to do now is to take a couple of minutes to close our eyes and think about what we've learned, if we've learned anything. Then I have a question I would like to ask. (pause)

You know, I talked to Welmek yesterday; and a lot of things have been going on about the materialization. There aren't a lot of new members here, and I didn't want to ask this question when my mother was here because she can't handle it. What I'd like to know is, how are we, after the materialization, you know they say our lives will be changed for the better..how is integrity going to play a part in each one of our lives afterward? Because I did ask Welmek yesterday if it was confirmed on the 24th and 25th of April and he said that it was, but he did not know whether the materialization would be Saturday or Sunday, depending on accommodations and several other things that could go on. But I'd like to know how our integrity is going to be challenged, how we're going to handle it. And I'd like to go around to each one of us.

L: Me? (laughter)

M: You should have known that one?

L: You know I suspected it. I must be telepathic. I don't really know what will happen. I expect my inner life will be changed, strengthened in some way by the materialization. As far as the outer world saying "What did you see?" or "What happened?", I would have to be totally honest. I suppose some of them would think I was absolutely crazy, but that's it. It is. And there are times when things happen to you and it just is. There is no getting around it, no going back, as Welmek would say, there is no going back. So I would hope I would never deny what I saw.

M: Would it strengthen you? Would it strengthen any of us?

S: Absolutely.

M: Your turn's coming.

B: I don't think there's a question of whether it would strengthen us. I've thought a lot about how it would change and what I would do and what I would say, how I would react. These questions are still in my mind, so there isn't any clear answer yet. There may never be an answer after it happens until the events are put face-to-face and we're confronted with whatever the situation is. I'm sure it's going to be trying; but I'm sure it's also going to be an experience. It's decision-making time, folks.

M: That's why I asked the question.

M: Oprah's show or not, huh? (Laughter) You know, Welmek told me yesterday that there were many, many disbelievers, doubters; and I thought this question would help many of us clarify if we wanted to be there or not, or whether we could stand up to some of the trials that might come. Because I know you Peter are entirely against it.

P: Against what? As we were talking the other evening, the questions and challenges to my own personal integrity are coming now, before the materialization. It's much like no matter how many times you've gone through the book, how well you know your lines, . .

B: When the curtain goes up, you get stage-fright..(laughter)

P: I've been on stage before, as an actor and as a stage crew member, and I'm extremely susceptible to stage-fright. But once the show's been done at least once, I find a better foundation and I find that it's got more definite surety or glue, as it were, and I don't have any problems continuing the show. But it's getting that curtain open the first time, I'm terrified; and I'd almost as soon run the other way. And that's where I have to fight myself.

A: I just think it's...(words lost)

A: Well, when we were talking about integrity, I had not thought about it as an ever-changing, evolving thing, as faith is ever-changing and evolving. And following that line of thought, I think that yes, there probably would be changes as far as the materialization.

It feels natural to me to have some apprehension, some concern; but yet I don't want that to hold me back from growth.

L: I think it will definitely have a major impact on me. I was trying to think as we were going around here, I was looking at some of the synonyms for integrity, and one of the ones that popped out at me with a lot of references in the Urantia Book was righteousness. There's a description of righteousness that I think is pretty interesting for me. It talks about the righteous character as being constituted by the coordination of ideas, decisions, logical ideals and divine truth. And as you read some of the other references, there's a tie-in to Adam and Eve and Cano in that though their motivations were good, their intentions were true, it wasn't part of the divine plan.

So thinking about those three components, I think a lot of what we talked about tonight has to do with the idea of decision and (?)ideals, but I think that third component, the divine plan, I think that will be an important thing for us to define(?) after this experience, not to take off with our own idea-decisions and our logical ideals, but to continue to keep that communication growing with our teachers and let them guide us as far as the divine plan. Because we don't have the perspective to know that independently and we have to trust in them.

The other thing that I feel like for me is that my experience at Jesus' birthday party this summer, I experienced a personal experience of love, Michael's love for myself personally, very, very strongly. And I have felt something beyond that in a worshipful, prayerful state on one occasion. I think that has done a tremendous amount for myself in terms of my faith and my process in terms of integrity.

It talks about in the Urantia Book about righteousness as also being tied to feeling God's love and the steps in regard to that. I think that experience will probably (?) in terms of feeling the love. I think the love energy that will be a part of that experience will be very profound as well.

One other comment. I also feel in terms of preparing for this, I don't think it's just a matter of personal preparation. We're talking about completeness and wholeness. We're looking at it as a personal thing, but if you read a lot of the references, they talk about wholeness and completeness in terms of a unity. In fact there's a statement here that I'd like to share.."The will of God does not necessarily prevail in the heart of any one personality, but it does actually rule in the whole universe of universes." I think we're a mini-cosmos of that and I think that group unity and the support that we can be for one another as we face others who may not believe and the trials that we will each personally have, I think this will be a real important family foundation for us.

S: She just said most of what I was going to say. (laughter) I think that it is going to be a test. As far as what other people will think, as long as we keep the Father's love, Michael's love, at the foremost of our minds, we can weather anything that anybody else can dish out.

M: So we all agree that there is somebody else here helping? Do we all feel that?

S: They're not doing this to hurt us or scare us or anything.

M: It's my understanding that we've asked for it.

M: I think it's like almost a gift. I'm like Linda. I feel that the support that we will need to give each other after and even before, as we get closer to the deadline, but afterwards, so that we will be able to deal with that as a group, whatever may come. That's going to take a lot of strength.

S: There's safety in numbers. (laughter)

S: I've been reading in the book today; this author is talking about the apostles, how they behaved before Christ was crucified and how they tried to go along with what Jesus was teaching them, but then when a crisis came, when Jesus was arrested, they turned tail and ran. But after the resurrection, they were so convinced with seeing him resurrect that they had no fear. They had the conviction and the integrity to go out and preach, even though they were under the threat of getting put in jail, which they did, of getting martyred, killed and all kinds of things. So I think that when we see this..

M: I want it geared to you. How are you going to handle it?

S: Well that's the way I feel. I feel that my conviction will be similar to what the apostles' convictions were, in that it won't bother me to tell the truth, irregardless of the consequences.

D: I look at it as a wonderful opportunity for growth. I envision it as the way to increase my faith, it will bolster my faith. It will also bolster the feeling of not only the love flowing through me, but the love that our helpers, our friends, our spiritual guides, have for us and to feel the reality of the Father's love probably more than I feel now.

And I also look at it as an opportunity to intensify the feeling of integrity, to make it a much more vital and active force in my life.

D: It will intensify my faith. I see integrity as a fabric upon which our other characteristics are woven; and the more moral decisions we make in the line of truth, the tighter the fabric is woven. And the more decisions we make for self-fulfilling unrighteousness, that fabric loosens. To see Welmek, or Machiventa, or any other creature materialize will give me more of a basis upon which to make my decisions. Now I have actually seen as well as believed.

G: I think it will be a very thrilling experience. Once we've seen it, it can't help but increase our faith. We may be slow or kind of lagging behind in things we do, and this will give us a boost to do things that we should have done before.

L: I agree with most of what everyone else has said. I think for me, personally, it's got to enhance what I've felt for a long time, belief. I think any testing I might have would come later; but I guess this being given to us will really strengthen us and help us be able to meet any challenges in the future if we buckle down and do what they are already trying to give us. Just go along with them.

J: I can't feel anything but hope and excitement at the thought of attending something like this. I may be a little bit naive, but any problems we have to deal with, I feel like we can rely on ourselves and on this group and in God, because God is going to be with us all the way through this and He's not going to give us anything we really can't handle.

B: For myself personally, it will be an ending and a beginning because it will be an ending of reaching out and thinking many times, why don't we get something I can hold in my hand? And I know many people feel that way. And it will be a new beginning because I will have seen. I will be so excited that's no one's going to be able to shut me up. (laughter)

S: I think I'm the kind of guy that takes things in stride here. To me, it would be a confirmation for sure. Is my faith true, yes or no? If you see it, yes my faith has to be true because I've seen it with my own eyes. It eliminates doubt, what have you? Even if nothing happened, we show up and nothing happens, my faith would not be wavered. I would still love God, Jesus, all that, we'd just have some more growing to do guys. As far as my own personal growth and integrity, right now I see this growing at a steady upward level, of course, and whether that is a nexus point to turn into geometric progression straight upward or continuing on at the same pace, I don't know. That's something that I think either way, it's going to be (?)

D: I think over the years reading the book and attending the study groups, it's given a new construct for the way the world is, and so we've been working toward a new integrity, a new vision. It's all-encompassing. These meetings are very much a part of that vision, so this is a way of giving us more substance to this integrity that we've been working on for years.

K: I think how this will help me...it will definitely increase my love and my devotion to these beings. As Welmek said in one session, it's the difference between talking to someone on the phone and seeing them face-to-face. But I also believe that regardless of whether this materialization will happen or not, we will be faced, as a group involved in this mission, with people who are doubters, who don't believe, who think we are crazy. I think that the materialization will strengthen, maybe bring us to a new level of integrity, to deal with the problems that we were really going to face anyway in this mission, if we take this mission seriously. So it's going to maybe bring us to a new level of integrity to handle what probably would already be happening.

M: Well, I thought about it; and sometimes I worry about myself because I honestly don't feel any apprehension whatsoever. That kind of worries me. (laughter) I look at it really as a very enlightening experience that is going to reinforce my faith. But I also believe that all of us really don't know how it will affect us because we're dealing with the finite mind; and there's the finite side of our being at this point in existence that simply is not predictable. Spiritually, yes, I think we're all going to grow, we're going to feel more whole or true and more faithful from it. But I still think it's going to be very...I think it's somewhat unpredictable. So I'm anxious, actually, because I know that nothing but good can come from it; and anyone or any group of people who get from it something negative or evil, I'll just pray for them.

M: Well, I think it'll definitely have a strong effect on our faith and so on. I'm off on the same vein I think Karla was. I ask the question, okay, afterwards, you are going to have am intensified sense of faith, but is that going to make keeping your integrity easier or more difficult? On the one hand, it seems it must make it more easy; but you know when you face the doubters and the others, if losing your integrity is losing the sense of your own self, that sense of feeling the Father's love, will it be easier to get angry at someone who doesn't accept this? Will it be easier to get frustrated by the lack of acceptance of this? I think those will be the challenges to our own integrity. So I guess I think on the one hand while it will intensify our faith, I think at the same time it will test our integrity to a greater degree; and hopefully we'll pass the test.

M: Well, several times he's told us that this will not strengthen our faith. I think that it will. I think that going through this is going to help me be stronger, be a better person, be a more loving person. You know, I also have one hope for this whole group. It is that the integrity we have for one another and how it's going to affect all of us.

You know, somebody was talking about the Gabriel experience and each one of us had a different experience; and I've heard and listened to several people say "Well, they weren't trying hard enough." or this or that or "They weren't listening." or "They didn't want to." or whatever else. You know, I would hope that after this and after thinking about the materialization and what's going to happen afterwards, that we can bond as a whole group, as one group, not only with ourselves, but with our Thought Adjusters, with Christ Michael, with our Father. Because you know, this group is very special. You know I wish I had the tape with me so that you could hear what Welmek told me today, and I'll bring it next Wednesday or I'll write down what he said. But the love that they have for us, and what we're doing.

You asked me whether I wanted this taped or not. I talked to a friend in another group to get some information, and they said that there is no one in their group that would take on an assignment like this. They just wouldn't do it; they're terrified of it. So I'm hoping that this goes out; and people who are terrified of taking on an assignment because, believe me, if somebody hadn't been pushing me from behind, I wouldn't have taken it. This voice kept saying "Take it, take it" I finally said "All right, I'll take it."

I have learned more from this than I think I have learned in the 17 or 18 years I've been in the Mormon church. I have learned more from you people than I have in years and years and years. I was telling Linda this the other day, I feel more loved, more accepted, more of about anything I can think of from this group than I have anyplace else that I have ever been. And I have been in many, many churches. Yes, I can be obnoxious; and yes, as Mark told me the other day, "Don't ask Marva unless you want to know exactly how she feels." (laughter) and Michael tells me that I need to have more tact. Well, I'm working on that too, Michael.

You know, I feel more accepted here; and taking this assignment really taught me a lot. It taught me that when I needed help, because when I called the five people I was so sick that I could hardly keep my head up and I didn't think I was going to be here, but I knew that if I called those people that I did....I sat back and I looked at the list and I said "I need help. Who can I call on?" The first person I called was Bob, and he said "No big deal, I'll take it." The second person I called was Stan. He said "Great, go for it." The third person I called was Steve, and he didn't want to do it and that was okay. Then I called Mark and he said "I don't want to do this."

M: No, I said I didn't want to do spiritual, I wanted to do personal.(laughter)

M: And I kept telling him "No,no, this little voice says that you're supposed to take this." and he said "Okay" He wasn't real thrilled but he took it anyway. The next one was a toss-up between Linda McEntyre and Larry over there. I called Linda and she was out fixing a flat tire and I figured, forget it, she's not going to have time anyway (laughter) so I called Larry; and Larry agreed to it. I talked to Michael and Michael was willing to help. And I'll tell you, between the two deaths we've had in the family this past two days and the illness I had, you have no idea of how much support you people have been. Because I could not have done it by myself. I want you to know how much I appreciate it. I think unless anyone else has anything to say, I think Welmek said he wanted to make comments afterward.

D: Before we do that, I think part of this process was for us to critique our moderator. Isn't that correct?

M: I asked him that yesterday, and he said he wasn't sure if he was going to do it or if you guys were going to do it.

D: How about both? (laughter)

K: You can tell she's a manager, because good managers delegate. Right? (laughter)

M: Well, I learned a lesson from that! (laughter)

S: Get ready for phone calls.

B: Don't compromise your integrity...(laughter)

S: Tell Stan. He delegated it to his wife.

M: No, no, I had them both on the phone and told them that both had to help.

D: I'll start, as far as the critique.

M: Hold on because I have some questions that Welmek gave me for that, just in case. He said..Peter you can read these, this is your handwriting.

P: Do they feel that they understand this term? is the first question.

GROUP: Definitely...yes.

P: Did they learn something from this?

GROUP: Absolutely...yes..I think so.

P: Do they feel the discussion went well?

GROUP: Yes...yes.

P: Was it too circular?

GROUP: Not at all.

M: That was the one thing that worried me. I could just see us giving the synonyms and then the whole conversation of last Wednesday.

P: Finally he asked, was it interesting?

GROUP: Yes...

D: The way in which you did it, of course you said it was based on your illness, but I thought you followed Welmek's model very well.

M: That's what he told me yesterday.

D: His whole way of teaching is to involve everyone, and Welmek is unlike a lot of the other teachers I know that tend to give lessons or control most of the conversation. I thought you did a really good job of separating out different levels of integrity and then assigning those discussions to other individuals; because a teacher's role is to not just dominate, it's to get everyone involved because that's how you learn is by doing it yourself. To assign it to people who maybe haven't been as voiceful, as active, perhaps, or whatever, was I thought, a real good choice on your part also.

You indicated clarity of thought, you indicated intention of purpose and overall I'd give you an A-plus. (applause)

M: Let me tell you what I told Welmek, and I was terrified of doing this and I was surprised I took it. I don't have a high school education. I finished everything but three and I've done those in the last 10 years. So in taking over classes like this, I have very little experience and I was terrified.

K: Some things you don't learn in a classroom.

M: No, you learn by taking care of about 9 kids all at once.

K: I know that feeling. (laughter)

S: Right answer, right person.

M: I think your sheet, the way you set up the lesson, definitions, references to the book, it gives you something that you can put in with your other papers as a good reference that you can go back to. There's good material to go look at again; and like Dave said, you broke it down in a way that I sat here and was quite proud of the whole group. I think considering that this was the first time that we as a group did this on our own, I have to admit that last week I had some second thoughts about how this was going to turn out, but to be honest, I'm impressed with how well we did tonight. I think we did excellent.

K: Well, I think it's a good idea to, when Welmek is speaking and we're having discussion, to have someone up here to kind of make sure that it doesn't go too far, or to see a hand raised if someone wants to say something because I think the floor is open too much.

GROUP: I agree.

D: I think you followed Welmek's example of how he teaches very well, as David mentioned, and I think that there is, that it takes a certain amount of creativity and intellectual capacity to understand how a teacher teaches to be able to then take that and mold it to your own way of presenting it. I think you did a very good job, because I know this has increased my depth of understanding of the kinds of integrity.

M: But now, I didn't do it all by myself.

D: You followed the model that was presented..

M: What impressed me was the way that you approached it. You didn't take the attitude that you had to have the answer and give an hour lecture on integrity. You had humility. You went out and you sought advice from others. You sought advice from Welmek, the teachers, which indicated you were humble, you were open-minded. That suggests that your goal was to create the best learning experience you could; and that type of motivation and that kind of problem-solving, I have a problem, I have to get this concept across to this group. You sought guidance, you sought advice from humans, from our teacher friends about how to do all that; and I think it's a great lesson that when you approach any problem in an open and humble way that your main goal is to do what was right and to do it in the best way possible. You did it. It held together extremely well.

M: I sat back and I looked at it; and I could have chosen four different ways of doing it. And the last one was an hour lecture because I know this group. You guys would be asleep in five minutes. You guys would be bored out of your skulls...you'd read it later. You really would. You'd read the transcript, but you wouldn't get anything out of it in this group, so why even try a lecture. I'm not a lecturer anyway. But that was my reason, because I know this group couldn't handle it.

D: You did very well in being as focused on one issue this length of time this late in the day.

A: I think our level of sharing and respect was increased in this meeting in what we have seen overall.

L: I think you've set a very high standard for everyone else to follow. (laughter)

K: Now it's going to be "Marva, your assignment is.." (laughter)

M: Let's see what the teacher has to say.

MACHIVENTA: This is Machiventa. I have [been] present and witnessed the event here this evening. You should not be surprised. This is of paramount importance to us; and since it is being broadcast throughout the system, it is necessary for all of us to be here to watch what is happening.

We are most pleased. I have reports back already from several planets of the delegations who have been assembled as to their response to this discussion and your interest therein. Throughout the system, reports are indicating how favorable things are moving on this planet, thanks to people like you. You should feel very honored. You should feel very pleased. I have no doubt that our Creator Son will even make a comment sometime in the near future as to this new phase that we are endeavoring to engage in.

There is no question about the importance of what we are doing here this evening. Once the materialization takes place, you will all be asked to become more or less teachers. The more experience you gain at this phase of your development, the better prepared you will be once you will go out and perform these tasks elsewhere. Many people will be curious about the visualization, and you will be there to answer their questions. The group will grow to such a size that you will find it necessary to splinter. You will find yourselves in multiple groups throughout your area. This is as it should be.

We are pleased to see those who feel as though they were not qualified to do such a good job in preparation and participation. You should be thankful that you are in a group such as this, one who is willing to share with each other their own personal thoughts and feelings. You make us all very pleased by your participation. We thank the Father for the love that really flows through all of us. We see within you the faith and love that makes you strong and whole, as the topic tonight suggests.

I will now turn this back to your teacher. But before I go, I want you all to know how personally pleased I am in you, and that I will take time this evening to pray for each one of you, that you may grow in His love, that you may attain the wisdom that you seek and that you may know more fully who you are and enhance your ability to communicate with the guide that your teacher has said has now been assigned to all of you.

Go in peace, my brethren. There is much to look forward to, to be grateful for and to celebrate in.

Closing

WELMEK: This is Welmek. The hour grows late, yet there is so much that I feel that I want to say. As your teacher, I feel overwhelmed. I feel as though I have had some impact upon you, for your discussion tonight illustrates how well a discussion of this nature can be conducted, how sincere of heart and mind the participants can be when so motivated.

You have set standards here this evening, not only for this mission, but for how life should be lived on your planet. For if the council chambers of the leaders of your individual governments would react in the same manner that you did tonight, surely the problems of this planet would be resolved in a minute. Unfortunately, this is not yet so. But we have begun. We have set a new course, and we will continue to pursue in this way for some time.

We have been in discussion as to the next meeting. I must tell you now, I am so inclined to change what I had originally decided upon because of the outcome of this meeting. In the future, we will have meetings where I or other invited guests will conduct lessons to enhance your understanding of particular thoughts or feelings; but for now, I perceive the best course for next week is to engage in another topic and follow the same format. It does please me to see you do this.

I, this is difficult for I have so many topics that I want to discuss, I would ask that you select the topic of faith. We have not spent an evening solely on faith, yet it does seem to come up in almost every meeting. Who will be the moderator?......Surely someone will volunteer, for now you know what to do.....Then I shall be the moderator.

Research what you can on the subject of faith, and I will lead your discussion next week. There is so much to talk about, my friends, before April. Integrity is important, faith is important, and the other topics that we will discuss.

One of the things that I and my associates are most concerned for you after you have witnessed this is how you will live your life as far as maintaining your existence. More specifically, I mean it is not our intention after this materialization for you to come home and to doubt your worthiness and your participation in your job, in your careers. We are concerned that some may feel as though they no longer serve a purpose in what they do, and therefore seek other avenues. Please be mindful of this and give it some thought. Your real purpose on this planet, if you so desire, is to serve the Father; and by serving the Father, you can do this in many ways at many times. It is not necessary to make such radical changes.

We feel this way because we know already from experience that when teachers speak to groups, there are those members who already feel this way, that they must leave their present occupation and find something of a more worthy cause. If you desire to do this, then so be it; but be mindful, there will be many opportunities to serve the Father. There will be many people who will start to come to you, who will seek your guidance, who will want to know of your religious experience. Share with them freely, as you have been shared with.

Having said that, I too, as my teacher has shared with you, will pray for each one of you this evening. My prayers will be that each of you feel more deeply the love of our Father and come to know Him more each day.

I have also just been advised that next week there will be comments from Michael. Until then, I wish all of you health, happiness, and peace of mind. Good evening.

GROUP: Good night, Welmek.