1998-03-15-Letting Go Of Resentments

Session

Opening

Ham: Greetings, children, I am Ham and I thank you all for coming tonight . Our schedule for lessons is proceeding as planned. You are all understanding, absorbing, and putting into practice some advanced teachings for your world.

Lesson

Resentment

You are all becoming a dynamic focus of love as you interact in the world . Your ability to influence others is directly proportional to your true spiritual development. The only way you can gauge your own progress is by looking into your heart and perceiving how much love you have for your fellows. Ask yourselves, every week , if you are growing in your ability to truly love your friends. Ask yourselves, are you growing in your ability to be non-judgmental toward your neighbor.

I want you all to think about where you want to be in love. Do you truly want to love every person you know and come in contact with? Or, are there some that you hold on to an inner grudge or resentment and do not want to love? Be honest with yourselves. Is there someone that holding a grudge against gives you some kind of gratification? I want you, in this moment, to consider putting that gratification in your special bag that you give to the Master. Can you give that up in exchange for greater love, do you really want to love this person or these persons?

I want you all to think right how about taking this gratification and this resentment as if it were a physical thing you could hold in your hand. Be very specific, think of holding this in your hand. Now, in your mind's eye, think about sacrificing this resentment and gratification, throw it into a fire and let it burn. This is your sacrifice. This is something you are giving up for the Father. And as you do this, as you let go of this resentment and the gratification that has kept you holding it, feel your heart open, feel that place that was taken up by this resentment now being flooded with love. Feel your heart's expanding, and in your mind, go to that person , put your arms around them, ask for forgiveness, and feel a new love within you pouring out to that person. Feel compassion and understanding. Allow yourself to understand that person, allow yourself to see them as God sees them, hurt, frightened, lonely. Let this love come over you, don't withdraw back into the old way, keep your heart open, keep the love flowing. Feel yourself be connected with the Father in such a strong and protected way that nothing that person could do to you in the future or has done in the past can truly harm you. You are above it. The harm that person does or has done passes completely through you and does not harm you. Keep letting go, keep letting go, resentment, anger, guilt, are all falling away, falling away. Is there anyone having trouble visualizing this or experiencing this?

Dialogue

Memory, Resistance

Q: Actually Ham I am in that I don't have any single individual to focus on.. The things I resent and get angry about are the actions of overall mankind an d what it has led society to being and the mess that it is in. Instead of changing for the better I see it being perpetuated. It effects me, but I cannot single out any one individual.

Ham: Very well, do the best you can. Anybody else. Good. Now stay with me, your resentment toward yourself, resentment for past actions that you feel have harmed you, things of this nature, things that you say, "I can't believe I was so stupid to have done this or that", take this resentment and gratification in your hands as a offering once again. Cast this into the fire. Think of all the times of your past , all the things you felt guilty about, everything, cast it into the fire. Keep pulling things up, you probably have a lot of them. Don't stop with the first one or two.

Q: Ham, this could take some time for me.

Ham: Let them come up, think back, as each one comes, toss it into the fire. Keep going there's more. When you are through, pray silently. "Thank you father for allowing me to do this, thank you father for accepting this sacrifice". Now allow your heart to open up. This one is more painful than the others. Allow the Father's love to wash away your guilt, to wash away all the residual bad feelings towards yourself . Visualize his love as a divine water washing over your heart and cleansing all your inner spaces. Visualize your heart opening more and more as you allow this cleansing. Now, visualize yourself. Visualize walking toward yourself, putting your arms around yourself, asking for forgiveness, and expressing your love for yourself. Say something like, "I didn't mean to hurt you, I have always loved you". Now see yourself, as the Father sees you. See yourself in total acceptance, total love, total understanding. Let a ll the resentment and the guilt fall away, it is still crumbling off the outer layers, it is crumbling away, falling away as you are growing brighter and brighter. The Father's love is filling your heart with love, with light, with peace, joy, and contentment. All these feelings are overwhelming as you let go of your old restrictions. Let the Father's warmth glow through your body, feel it healing,

See yourself in your future perfected state, visualize yourself as you will be on Paradise. Know that your future perfected self lives within you even now. Feel for a moment the purity, the holiness of who you really are and what you are becoming. When you see yourself in this way, there can be not bitterness, no resentment, no guilt. All is real, all is spirit, all is truth, all is oneness and harmony. This greater you, has now broken all the chains of the former self, and now inwardly you know how truly free you really are. Is anyone having trouble with this visualization? Good.

Now that you have experienced this feeling of the greater you and are at peace with it, you cannot be tempted to go back into the old ways of thinking and the old ways of reacting to others. Allow this greater you to change everything. Allow this greater you to merge with the you of the now time, to heal you, to open you up to your true potential. And now, when you meditate during this week, I want you to visualize the future you, the perfected you on Paradise. Bring this greater self in everyday more and more. Feel comfortable and at ease with all the change and all the expansion that he or she brings you. Are there any questions at this time?

Q: It's not a question, but I want to thank you for this great gift and without presuming to tell you what to do, but we could stand a lot of this kind of thing.

Ham: Yes, we will be doing more of this kind of work.

Q: Can this be a continual process as we meditate to follow this as an outline of uncovering all the deep resentments that could not immediately bring up?

Ham: Absolutely

Q: I was glad that everyone got so much out of it, but I felt like when I voiced my problem with it you just went on.

Ham: Maybe your resentment toward me is something that you could throw in to the fire today?

Q: I don't resent you Ham, I was just disappointed.

Ham: Daughter, you can work on this mediation in your own time and perhaps you will find a way to work on it and make some progress. Don't worry if everything does not immediately, connect, it is not a requirement.

Q: I guess the response that I was looking for, would it have been, ok since I did not have an individual could I focus the same exercise towards organizations, corporations, governments?

Ham: No.

Q: Thank you.

Q: Could you elaborate on resentment and self-gratification?

Ham: Yes, humans tend to hold on to resentment like a dog gnawing a bone, just chew it over and over and over. This creates a kind of a gratification that is not really logically explainable, but I am sure you have all experienced it.

Q: Do we do this to keep from moving on?

Q: Or to make excuses for yourself, by blaming it on your resentment?

Ham: There are many reasons and explanations of why this is so, and it is different for every person and situation.

Q:What is the payoff?

Ham: It's different for every person and every situation. There is no real payoff.

Q: I mean the hope for a payoff?

Ham: Usually some kind of self-justification.

Q: Sometimes I just blot the resentment out and say I will deal with it on the mansion worlds, is that a valid technique?

Ham: Why put off for tomorrow what you can deal with today. Blocking something out of your mind isn't the answer. Some humans are very adept at this psychological juggling act. Because the resentment is still there if you open that door.

Q: I imagine it is a heavy weight that keeps us from progressing at a faster rate.

Ham: Yes, and it is a blockage to your full psychological balance, development, and spiritual expansion. If you all look deep enough, you'll find resentments when your were a little tiny child still sitting there. So, blocking them away and forgetting about them isn't a help.

Q: Does this mean that we consciously have to recover all those memories from our childhood?

Ham: They'll come up when you are ready to see them, when you are ready to let go of them.

Q: If we have practiced this technique, we will know exactly what to do when they come up?

Ham: Yes.

Q: One thing that worries me is that I will not be able to stay in my higher self and that the old patterns will come back.

Ham: Yes, you will find that it is easier to change than you think it is.

Q: We can deal with this without confronting the individuals?

Ham: Yes.

Q: Say we practice this letting go, and later there is a residual. Can we practice this later. This is not a one time thing?

Ham: Probably not.

Q: Are we not just talking about forgiving?

Ham: Pretty much, but it's helpful to use this technique to actually cast out the old resentments which can linger even when you have thought you have forgiven someone for something.

Q: Rather than just experiencing a feeling, this involves applying a technique or a combination?

Ham: Yes, think of this as a tool that you can use if you so desire.

Q: As we did this I could experience myself as distinctly different from my physical body. As I reached for my perfected future self, I felt as if being embodied was holding me back.

Ham: Yes, exactly, this is very good.. You are experiencing correctly.

Q: What seemed great to me is to borrow wisdom from this perfected being which will be fused by that time with the Father, a little foretaste of that kind of wisdom and love.

Ham: Yes, exactly. You are experiencing correctly.

Q: Being able to borrow maturity like a lay away plan.

Q: What is interesting to me is that we are actually contributing to the wisdom and growth of the future self at the very same time.

Q: I actually saw a morontial picture of myself, it wasn't me and it was me, and it was really happening. Can you guys see our thoughts or know what we are experiencing when we go through this?

Ham: Not exactly, but yes you are experiencing correctly.

Limitations

Q: I was reading in the newspaper about preacher saying he could not believe all would go to heaven. He seemed very determined to hang on to the idea that most people who did not believe as he did would go to hell. This attitude seems very wide spread, There seems to be a need to hold onto this idea that only a few special people with the right beliefs will be worthy of going to heaven. It is so different from what you have been teaching us. What can we do to counter act this kind of thinking?

Ham: Yes, the greatest things that you can do to influence another person is to become a dynamic focus of divine love and to share this love with all you come in contact with. To that there can be no argument. Humans always tend to place limits on God to keep him somehow manageable predictable, etc. But you are learning another way, that there are no limits on the Father and as you progressively identify with him, your limitations are gradually breaking down.

Q:As I look back at human history, struggling in the darkness, trying to get hold of God, it seems to me that man has usually found it easier to invest God with human qualities than it is for man to partake of God's qualities and it causes that kind of crap.

Ham: Exactly.

Personal Counsel

Q: Ham, do you have any parting words for me please?

Ham: Yes, daughter, you are loved and I love you very much. Go in peace and as you work through this week, look deep in your heart and open yourself to vulnerability. Allow yourself to be vulnerable, allow yourself to be exposed. Feel what that feels like. See if you can do this in any way you can, even in your imagination.

Q: Ham do you have anything for Esmirelda?

Ham: Daughter, everything is fine. You worry deep in your heart without letting others know that you worry. Let go of this worried feeling, all will be well an d as it should be. Fear not.

Q: Jim F wanted a message too Ham.

Ham: Son, you are moving pretty fast. Your spiritual progress has been rapid and you are know feeling the first effects and bearing good fruit. Know that you are not alone, that you are supported and sustained by many angels, midwayers, and teachers. Soon, you will be brought to others who will join you. All is well.

Q: Elena?

Ham: Daughter, you are finally feeling safe and comfortable. You will be called into new areas that will change that so you must find an inner sanctuary where there is peace and comfort always.

Q: Rebecca

Ham: Daughter, you are learning great spiritual lessons now and are experiencing tremendous growth and expansion in your confidence and trust in God. This is as it should be.

Q: Myself.

Ham: Jarad, you are going through some difficult times and are not using all your spiritual tools. Remember, you must let go of resentments, you must return to your inner sanctuary often to draw energy and guidance. Meditation must be a priority.

Q: I would appreciate your feedback this week too please.

Ham: Brodan, you are learning to relax and to take life easier. You are becoming more bendable, so that when something hits you unexpectedly, you can bounce back without damage and this is a tremendous step forward for you. Think of this image like a tree blowing in the wind when the wind stops it comes right back. Think of this flexibility and resilience as being integral in your character. Think of the tree and like it, you are firm yet flexible.

Q: Do you have any counsel for me tonight Ham?

Ham: Yes, Son, your life is truly changing for the better. You are opening up to new experiences and greater awareness and understanding than you have ever had before. Be at ease, for all is well and as it should be. You do well son.

Q: Ham, any advice you have for me tonight I would appreciate.

Ham: Yes, son, you are as always doing very well and making progress. You have some emotional blockages that are preventing you from maturing in a balanced way. Apply the resentment exercise and see what comes up and how you are affected. You will be greatly helped by this particular exercise.

Q: Ham do you have anything for me this week.

Ham: Certainly, son. You are doing very well, making great progress. Be at ease with everything. You tend to get too rushed and too worried. Try to slow down. Think of the Master who was never in a hurry and he was never worried. Think of his example and try to emulate him.

Q: I was watching PBS last night and they had the turn of the century Mexican healer Theresa. From what she said, she started with the church and started healing people. She did not give credence to the church so they excommunicated her. It seems like people like her come to this planet to teach us that the church is man's truth as distinct from God's truth. I though it was interesting how what she was saying back then paralleled the teaching mission.

Closing

Ham: Yes, son, the Father has never stopped sending messengers with his message into the world/ You will find it every where. Until next week, my prayers are with you. I love you all.