2001-02-25-Acceptance & Open-Heartedness

Session

Opening

Ham: Greetings children, I am Ham and I am grateful to you that you each have chosen this evening to attend our discussion session. We are continuing our lessons concerning acceptance and open-heartedness.

Lesson

Acceptance

The essential nature of God welcoming and God understanding is the attitude of having an open heart, of accepting and releasing love and all its ramifications; forgiveness, understanding, acceptance, tolerance: those things which are thought of as fruits of the spirit, are indeed the action of love in the world.

So what does it mean to have an open heart, to welcome the spirit of our Father into your soul? It is an attitude of humility and an attitude of complete childlike trust. It is the act of complete vulnerability, of accepting the purity of a child, accepting your own pure-heartedness, being completely un-deceitful, completely open to all that is. Being open to the Father’s love, simultaneously makes one open to the world as well. It softens the heart and mind, giving one an open, honest, soft-heated attitude toward the Father's other children. When the Master said, "How many times must you forgive your brethren? You must forgive infinitely, for each insult the world hurls upon you, you must return that insult with love and forgiveness." Because when you harden your heart toward one person or several people, you are closing off that part of your heart that must receive the Father’s love, that love that must pass through to all of His children.

When the Master instructed that we must, if receiving a blow on one cheek, we must turn the other to receive what will come. We must do something that shows even more vulnerability, something that exposes one even further, rather than taking steps to strike back. This is probably the most difficult lesson for you living in the world of much cruelty and injustice. To completely follow Him. It is essential to continually make oneself vulnerable to the slings and arrows of the world and to receive those blows without vengeance or thought of revenge. When you learn to take all that someone will throw at you without striking back, when you learn the art of this, you will know very much. For in this manner, you always win. When you take all the anger, all the insult, all the hurt and fear of someone else, and turn back on them, love and forgiveness, then you have truly triumphed in the spirit and have learned a great lesson on earth.

People are frightened children. They harm each other out of fear more than any other emotion. A wise parent understands that when their child strikes out in fear, that to remove that fear, you must absorb their childish behavior, their crying, their hitting out, their childish action and comfort that child so that the fear is released and replaced with love. How many times has your Heavenly Father reached out his arms toward you when you have refused his comfort and remained in your fearful or angry attitude? But the Father does not withdraw His love. The Father intensifies His efforts to show you His love. So must you intensify your efforts to show love to those who show you no love, who show you anger, or fear, or hurt.

Understand that human beings are not so much evil as fearful, and this fear can drive people to great lengths of anger. Mostly, because they want their fear changed, even if they can change fear into anger, as least it isn’t experienced as naked fear anymore. People are running from themselves very often and in doing so, they adopt an attitude which temporarily delivers them from fear. But it is a falseness and it is not a true deliverance. Human beings only find deliverance from fear in love. Only love can cast out fear, and with that fear will be cast out those associated emotions like anger, or hatred, bigotry and intolerance. Human beings often hold on to their bigotry, their hatreds, almost as a comfort, almost as a shelter from fear. The people who are most full of hate toward others have great fear of themselves. What they hate in others is what they fear in themselves and this fear and hatred can become almost codified in a little ritual of intolerant thinking that temporarily creates a shelter from introspection.

The Father commands only one thing, that you should love Him with all your hearts and should strive with all your might to become more and more like Him - more perfect in your thoughts, in your words, and in your deeds. The Father draws His children to Himself through love and only through love. There is never a set of rules, that if you should break them, would alienate His children from Himself. Nothing can alienate the child from the Father, but the child’s own will, own decisions. The Father seeks only to lovingly draw His children toward Himself and for His children to partake of His nature in greater and greater degree. The Father’s nature is that of complete love, that of absolute love, such love that if you should glimpse just a part of it, you would scarcely be able to remain on earth.

The Father’s love as it comes to you in this earthly form is very much tempered or diluted, so to speak, so that you can receive it, but that love is still strong enough to cast out all fear, to cast out all impurity in the heart. So that the more you receive, the more you can receive and so forth. The Father’s love is like a great purifier. The more love you can accept for yourself, the more pure your intention of love is toward others, and the more pure your love is toward others, the more closer you are to the Father. Therefore, seek not after those things that others can do for you, rather seek what you can do for others through your heavenly nature. Seek to expand that heavenly nature, so that you may be more and more useful to the Father in this life. Expand your love for Him. Allow His love to caste out all impurity. Open your hearts completely to Him and simultaneously, open your hearts to His children. Be soft-hearted, vulnerable people. Accept the injustice of the world without complaint. Give back to all who injure you. Give back love a hundredfold. Pray for those who have been spiteful toward you or have used you. Pray that they may be open to the Father’s love and pray that you can forgive them. Pray for all those who are injured and pray for all those who injure you or others. Have an open heart for all and do not close your heart to anyone. In this, you shall learn many lessons of the spirit. You will learn about yourself and you will learn about others.

Dialogue

Are there any questions at this time?

Defense

David H: I understand that we must learn to turn the other cheek, but what happens when turning the other cheek means termination of your earthly existence? Is there a point where human being have to protect their earthly existence? As an example, when Ganid and Michael met the barbarian, the lesson was you have to defend yourself. That’s where I struggle with it. I know love is the key, but what about self-preservation also?

Ham: Well yes, certainly that is an extreme example. And that is a point where everyone must decide for themselves. There are, of course, times of warfare, times of extreme human situations which call out for self-preservation at the expense of others. But at some point in your world’s evolution, this extreme animal behavior will be greatly lessened and be more and more rare. There are of course those individuals who know not the light of God and who embrace completely the perfidy of their own selfish designs. These people who embrace evil so completely will certainly meet with a justice in the end of things, but individuals must not take it upon themselves to meet out justice to other individuals. This is the function of society as a whole and each case is its own world of moral shades of grey, but let us pray that you will not meet with such an extreme situation in the future.

David H: So it’s not so much premeditation as a reflex.

Ham: Yes, that is absolutely true.

T: What about when someone slanders you and damages your reputation and you feel a need to stand up for your honor. Is using the legal system the right way to go about protecting yourself?

Ham: Yes, certainly, when in such a situation, it is absolutely correct to stand up for truth, yes. But emotionally and spiritually be careful not to be drawn into the tit for tat level of "I hit you, you hit me" kind of fight. Be careful to stay a level above and maintain a level of dispassionate outlook, so that you are not emotionally drawn in. Standing up for what is right and defending what is true is absolutely what is required of you.

T: Even though it causes friction and negativity, it’s still the thing to do?

Ham: Every situation of course is different. Sometimes the road of litigation can be more damaging than simply taking the initial assault and moving on. But it is difficult to extricate yourself once you are involved in that process because then it is step after step after step. So I understand that you have conflicts in wishing this to be resolved and over with, but at the same time needing to go each step as it drags on. Remember that this is a learning process. There is not right or wrong in the totality of your decisions. You are simply learning. By making this decision, or that decision, you are learning all that goes with it, so I would say the value is found in what you are gaining as far as experience with human nature, experience with the simply the legal system and experience with yourself and the hard decisions that you have had to make. You’ve tried to be above it and yet be part of it at the same time and it has been very stressful. So it is not a question of what is best or what would have been best to have done in the past or to do now, but simply a question of what can you learn from this experience, what are you taking from it and what is it giving you? Yes, it is taking a lot, it is taking a lot of emotional energy, but it is also giving you something as well. The more you find that it is giving you, the more you will find strength within it to carry forward.

Personal Counsel

Marriage

Katy: Ham could I have a personal message?

Ham: Certainly, daughter you are experiencing and learning many lessons that will bring you into another level in your life, another phase of your life. You have made a very big decision to join your life with Marc’s and this is a very permanent, life changing decision. It is one of great empowerment. A decision that you have both made that will give you each great strength and will give you the base, the solid base, from which you can move forward in other areas. You are finding new levels in your own creativity. Your own path is taking new directions that will be good for you. Have openness to the help of others. Be vulnerable in your asking of them for advise or encouragement or whatever. Work in your relations to get through the feelings of the past, the old feelings that come from childhood. Deepen and broaden your relationships with your family. Yes, don’t be afraid to be vulnerable with them, for they love you so much and wish only for the best for you. Be aware that you are surrounded by much love, there are many people who desire to help you and to be unselfish givers. There is a part of you which wants to be the sole architect of your life, but now you are coming to understand that all people live with the help of other people. No person is detached from the whole of humanity. And now your family is expanding with your marriage and you are gaining even more family who love and desire to help you and protect you. You also have a family in your friendships with those in this group who love you very much and who have a great respect and regard for you. Find a peace in that, find a relaxation, that you’re not struggling by yourself, but you must learn to relax in the comforting knowledge that you are surrounded by love and by those who wish to help you.

Bob: Could I have a message Ham?

Growth

Ham: Certainly. My son, you do well. You are also beginning to relax with yourself, to be more at ease with who you are and with your potentials and with your actuals. Remember that everything that is actual, is also potential for something else. Everything that is, is also part of something that is becoming. All of life is a process of growth. You are never one static thing, but rather a combination of things that are fading and things that are blossoming. Just like a plant with many flowers, there are some which are just budding, some in full bloom and some which have bloomed and are dying. So it is with human development. Always are the new buds coming forth and blossoming out while the old are fading and falling away. So it is with your creative nature. You are reaching for something new and greater and more, but at the same time, it is also part of all that was, all that is. As you take each new step out into greater and greater experimentation and creativity, remember also that the life force of it, the sap or the blood that feeds it is that which comes through you, through the center of you, that gives you everything that you are. Be more of who you are. Be more expressive of that, more fully that, more completely you. Have complete faith in that being, that person that is you, that is unique. Do not parcel off your faith, so that some of your faith is over here in this project and some of it is over there in that project. Have your faith in yourself and that faith is complete. All these projects that are part of your growth are simply that, they are part of you, but not you. Keep your faith in you and in that part that is growing and becoming. Do not worry about the fate of that which is done and completed, for these things will find their way in the world. Remember to cleave closely to the Master in all things and to allow his comforting hand about you and to rest upon his shoulder in your weariness. Rely on Him. Draw comfort and strength from Him and you will be fine.

David H.: Do you have anything for me tonight?

Spirit

Yes my son, you also are growing in fundamental ways and are becoming more accepting of what is. You are a great idealist. A person who sees things the way they should be more than the way they are at times. You have a tendency to want to want to believe in this better world, the world that should be, and so are continually disappointed by the world as it is. Keep your heart and your faith centered on God alone, centered on the spirit, and the things of the world will constantly surprise, or disappoint, or disillusion. The things of the world are constantly in flux and are completely undependable. Only the things of the spirit can be depended upon. All else is transitory and ever-changing. Rely on the spirit always. Everything else can disappoint, even your own intellect, your own knowledge. These things will continue to disappoint you until you learn to rely more and more on the spirit.

T: Could I have a message of a personal nature?

Ham: Daughter, you are a person who finds the silver lining in most things. You are one who constantly brings joy and comfort to others. Remember to rely on the spirit, to learn as you have, that the world is a fickle place where the hopes and dreams of yesterday can be shattered in a moment. There is no permanence in the world, only change. The only permanent thing you will find is the Father’s spirit, the love of God. His love is permanent and grows stronger over time and grows stronger as you grow toward Him and become more and more reliant upon Him. Do not worry about tomorrow so much as focusing on today - one day at a time. You can only do so much in a day’s working hours. Do not worry that you should do this or you should do that. Take that which comes and discharge your duties without worry about worry about what will happen in the future. Use this opportunity to develop your sense of acceptance and spiritual poise. Go forth with great love and care and be completely at ease for you do very well.

Melissa wants a message.

Ham: Daughter you are doing well. You have also to learn to relinquish your anxiety, your fear of loss of control or fear of abandonment. Remember that the Father never abandons His children. He will be with you through everything and His arms are open wide should you decide to partake of His comfort. You have a tendency to magnify problems through worry and anxiety. Remember to use the stillness in order to bring problems into their proper perspective and remember to live each day one at a time without trying to worry so much about tomorrow and the next day. It is impossible to know the ramifications of all our actions. You cannot be so worried about what might happen that you paralyze yourself and do not take action when it is needed. Be at ease my dear, you are doing well.

Keri also.

Ham: Yes my dear, you likewise are doing well. There are many times when you feel that the pressure of your work is perhaps too much, but then again, the rewards are also very great and your enjoy this work very much. Do not worry that you should make great changes at the moment. Stay the course a while longer and be secure that you have the knowledge that everything will work out as it should. Be generous with yourself and have an open heart. All things will work for the best.

Esmeralda?

Ham: Yes, of course. My daughter you are doing well and have grown very much. Understand that you are learning and changing with each passing day. There is no one time when you will graduate from this level to that or there will probably not be a great celebration when you graduate to the next level, at least in terms that people would understand. But know that you are making great strides and are certainly graduating from one level to the next. Be at peace. Have no anxiety, for you are doing very, very well and have made good progress quite recently.

Elena?

Ham: Yes my daughter, you are doing very well. There is part of you which questions everything and part of your which seeks to be a part of the established way. You are constantly questioning and yet also constantly seeking acceptance in established groups. Be aware that you’re not the only one who is questioning. Others also question and are comforted to know that there are others who also have questions. So do not feel that you must hide all your feelings in certain situations. Always seek the truth for this is the most important thing.

Rebecca?

Ham: Yes, my daughter, you are doing well. You have come far in the last few months and are learning great lessons at the present time. Do not be pressured, but rather work with an ease and confidence without too much stress. Remember not to neglect your own creative outlets, for this is very important for you.

Jarad?

Ham: Yes my son, have confidence and courage and do not feel pressured, but rather take the lulls in activity to recharge your batteries and relax and rest. Have no anxiety. Learn to banish this emotion. Open your heart more and more to acceptance and to love. Be at ease my son, you do very well.

For Glen?

Ham: Did he ask this of himself? (No, I’m asking for him.) Allow him to ask for himself when he is ready. That is always the best way. I do not force my advise or opinions on anyone, but give to all who ask freely of their own volition. I am aware of one more question from Charlie Beyer.

Son, you do also very well. Renounce your tendency toward anxiety. Let your watchword be trust, trust and more trust. Trust in the face of all that happens. Increase your trust and you will have come very far. That is all.

Closing

For now my love and my prayers are with you each, farewell.