2008-02-04-Co-Creative Design Team

Session

Opening

SONDJAH: Good evening, this is Sondjah. (Good evening.) It is a pleasure to be with you. You seem to be quite at peace tonight. A new blanket of snow seems to have put a lull and a dampening into the energy around us, and this is good. I wish to relate that we had a good experience a few days ago, discussing many questions that had been latent among you for quite some time, and two of our members took it upon themselves to invite me to their home, to ask these questions. You will find the dialog and discussions perhaps enlightening and helpful to our discussions about Co-Creative Design Teams, particularly having to do with relationships and the work that we are doing with that.

Lesson

We have made a good deal of progress. We hope that you are satisfied with how we have been doing. Remember—and I continue to advise you—that this is all developmental, that we are discovering “the way.” We know the goal and where we will end up, but how we get there is a co-creative process between you and us. This is new territory for you and for us. We will be making slow progress, perhaps, according to your technological inclinations, but this is hearty work; this is heartfelt, it is solid, it is something that will become very permanent in your culture. We do not say “hope” to become permanent in your culture, for we know that it will become a very permanent element in your education and your families and the relationship designs that you experience and share with your children and grandchildren, and their children in the future.

Last time I asked you to go to your sub-groups, to discuss and try to discern the fundamental values of relationships. What values underpin each of these six relationship paradigms, and I gave you a clue that these values underpin all of them. Some have variations of them, but the values that underlie them are fundamental to every relationship that you would enter into. I might add too that we are here speaking about enlightened individuals, who enter into enlightened relationships. We are talking about those who aspire to have and participate in a sustainable relationship. This requires an advanced mind, a sincere intention and dedication and commitment to their own development in the relationship, as well as being of assistance to their partner.

You may ask quietly in your mind, “Well what percentage of people would engage in an enlightened sustainable relationship for the future?” And we say at this time that we would be most fortunate to acquire a third of your population, even in years from now, after this has been introduced. Not everyone will want to participate; not everyone is inclined to; not everyone has a spiritual inclination or connectedness to their world, to their civilization, their culture, their communities—or even their families. Therefore, they will withdraw. We are talking about pragmatic, spiritually inclined idealists. Now that is quite a mouthful, I suppose, but we are talking about individuals who aspire to an ideal, and who are inclined to take practical steps to fulfill that ideal. There comes a reality for them in the future that what you design for sustainable relationships will become useful to you and to other people in your communities and your society.

You, sitting here, and those who have been here are pragmatic idealists. You are spiritually inclined, and you are willing to do the hard work and have said you will do the hard work, by showing up time after time. We know that in this mountainous state it is most difficult during the winter months to be here every week, and it is difficult as well because this is a new activity and it competes with your old activities, which also meet on the same night. We are greatly indebted to you for being here, for putting forth your effort in a practical way to fulfill ideals, ideals that will satisfy you and give you hope, and others much hope in the future.

Searching for the values of a society are much like a social, anthropological research jaunt, out into a primitive or an unknown culture, where you would go out and be with these people for weeks and months and perhaps years to discern what is important to them. What do they hold important in their culture, for their lives, for their occupations, for their relationships, for their children, for their heritage and for their traditions? What is of value? What is important to you? What is important to anyone who wishes to participate in a sustainable relationship? Here we have a quandary; we have a conundrum that you and we are engaged in, simultaneously, and that is this: That most of you do not know what a sustainable relationship looks like. You have an idea what one would look like as a model, and as an ideal, but we are searching to develop or find the values that underpin sustainable relationships.

Therefore, we asked you to go do some social research on the Internet, at the library, in some old textbooks that you may have for anthropology or sociology and such. You have had an opportunity to discover that. Some of you have had success, and some of you have been daunted by the task. The question that we want to answer is: “What is of value that holds your relationships together, the common values that hold sustainable relationships together?” Let us continue tonight to work on this problem, this issue. You may wish to participate in a single team again, as we did last week, as this is a small group again this evening, or you may diverge and divide into 2 smaller sub-teams, if you wish. It is your choice.

We ask that you give each other opportunity to share your ideals and your ideas about what a sustainable relationship is and what values hold them together. What is of value (valued) in a sustainable relationship? You might ask at the same time, “What is valued in a sustainable relationship that is not usually recognized in a conventional relationship? I know this is an awkward question, but the questions have been similarly posed in times past in research in your societies and as others have gone out to unknown cultures to discover how these cultures stay together and survive and maintain themselves. Are there any questions right now that I could answer for you? (Pause.) Hearing none then let us proceed forward to the teamwork that you will engage this evening, and we will reconvene when you are ready. There is no time set for this, no 20 minutes limitation or 40 minutes—it is simply up to you. You will know when your work has been completed. Do not be surprised if you come to some obvious conclusions very rapidly, and then through the remainder at a slower pace. I will now step back from the microphone and release you to your work. Thank you.

Daniel: It is kind of like he’s in this rocking chair just going, “Oh, it’s nice listening to you guys. It’s been a really nice evening.”

SONDJAH: This is Sondjah. The one who I speak through said something quite close to how I feel about what has come through this evening. Between you all, you have made wonderful strides and contributions. You have each helped each other ferret through, sort and sift and discern the values that underpin sustainable relationships. This work will continue. You will find as you do more research that this is a valuable topic, and that you will want to discern again, the beliefs that emanate from these values.

We have spoken about the secondary and tertiary levels that spin out of the values of behaviors and things that you do, think, and say. You also mentioned an educational program as a primary socializing factor for young children who do not come from homes that talk about fundamental social values or the important “glue” that holds relationships, communities, families and societies together. You are literally talking about and developing and inventing the glue that holds sustainable relationships together.

As these two will be gone, [Speaking of Daniel and Sherille] for two Mondays, we wish that you continue, and we wish that you would share the leadership or facilitation for the group. You have ideas and thoughts about what occurs during the week; please bring them forward and share them with others. You may have a tack to go one direction, while others go another. Share your ideas with each other to see what you want to develop. Know, however, that I am here and that I will be available, and most pleased to speak through anyone of you or several of you, if you wish. Now, if you have any closing questions before we adjourn, please address them now.

Dialogue

Michael: I have a question, Sondjah. Not for tonight’s discussion, but for future discussion or feedback, because it keeps coming up in a variety of ways, and that is how do we go about that which is occurring here, where people are getting deeply into defining meaningful, sustainable relationships, and yet leave and go off to friendships and other relationships that don’t resemble that, or are not even open to discussing it? I know at least 4 people in this group, some who are not here tonight who have this experience, and it would be potentially helpful if we could explore that?

SONDJAH: Most certainly. Would you like me to take the time, a few minutes now to discuss this? (Sure.) Certainly. This we knew in advance, that the Co-Creative Design Teams would be a can of worms for some of you. We knew that it would open up issues, which you had not examined and were unaware and then, became aware. Or, it would bring up issues that were latent in your mind and you had hidden them back behind your eyelids ready for the team discussions to bring them to the forefront. This is most difficult for some of you, and almost all of you have experienced this in the past, in one way or another. This waking up in a relationship and wondering why you are in the relationship and what held you there, and what promise it held for you in the future, other than pain and agony and disappointment.

For those who have found pain and difficulty in being here, and going back to their relationships, we offer only that this is part of your journey. Relationships are oftentimes transitory, when they are not founded on stable, solid bedrock of sustainable relationship principles. You have come to a point where you discover that your relationship has no commonalities anymore, and that you have grown, or perhaps your partner has not grown, and that you have grown apart. This is very painful. The choice is to remain and see this as a learning environment, as one spoke of tonight, to see your nemesis as your teacher. This is a very enlightened way to proceed, as long as it is not abusive.

The other potential is to leave the relationship, but before doing so you must ask, “Have I learned everything that I can in this relationship?” as you have been told once before. Truly, relationships are the arena for great spiritual growth. The growth in spirit always begins with the emotional. It has its background in the social and in the personal realms. You are in the grist mill of growth and the large kernels that you have seen, which were nice and beautiful to begin with, and have now been ground into a gruel or a meal, and then if you wait long enough, you’ll find it will turn into wonderful flour, from which you can make something else. You will have the leavening then to bake new bread, in a new relationship.

We do not leave you abandoned. You are never abandoned, for you always have with you a multiplicity of spiritual beings that are with you. You know that there is already the Spirit of Truth about you, which Jesus left when he arose and went into heaven. This Spirit of Truth is his essence; it is the touchstone for knowing what is right and what is not right. It is different and apart from your intuition, but it is a real aid for you now. This Spirit of Truth now is very powerful upon your world and has access to you at any moment. Further, Christ Michael, whom you knew as Jesus, has his presence here—not his physical presence, but truly his individual presence is here for each of you, individually. You can have an intimate personal relationship with him, you can ask him a question and he will answer you forthrightly, promptly and with intense heart energy, so that you will feel this and know it is true. You are not abandoned for you are living in a time now where the eminence, the presence of spirit in many forms is about you and with you. You have within each of you, the fragment of the Creator, this perfect being, who is a part of the Creator, a replication, a perfect image, only in much diminished form, so that you can live with it and it can help you grow. It too is available for you at any time, to ask for advice.

It is best, too, for when you are in these throws of difficulties, to take yourself apart and go into your closet, as Jesus said so many years ago, that quiet space where you can become one to listen, to absent your mind of anything that occupies, other than knowing the presence of the great love that is within you. And when the love outside yourself is so diminished and so wanting, this love within you is so full and so complete, absorb this into your being, elevate yourself into its eminence and walk with that oneness, which you know to be true, and will help you when you leave that closet of quietness and go about your day.

Many of you have entered into relationships naively, innocently, and now you have awakened as an enlightened being. You have become higher; you have really “risen,” so to speak; you have resurrected yourself from the old person you were, into a new evolved individual. You are not the same, yet you accept and expect similar or same results from your relationship that you had 20 years ago, or some years ago. This cannot exist. You are in throws of much change. Be gentle with yourself, ask for guidance, guidance that you can tolerate, handle and absorb and use constructively, rather than rushing into change that crushes you and grinds you into nothingness. Be kind to yourselves, love yourselves, and know that you are loved as well.

I know that this is elevated talk about the pragmatics of living in a difficult relationship, but you, my dear friends are here, in a spiritual forum. This is the spiritual forum of living in a society, applying your self, and yes this may be part of the journey to apply yourself in a difficult relationship. Be easy with yourself as you proceed; do not rush quickly, but do so thoughtfully. Always see this as a learning lesson and ask, “What am I to learn from this? Please help me learn this gently.” We hope this helps. (Many thanks from group members.)

Closing

Our blessing is upon you. Know that each of you has been touched in your hearts and in your souls. Know that you now have a mark of love upon you, which you have accepted a long, long time ago, and now you feel it for real, in your heart and your presence. We love you and we wish you well during your week ahead, good night.