1993-03-22-Struggles

Session

Opening

LinEL: The love of the Father surrounds you. The love of the Father lifts you up and holds you close. The love of the Father strengthens you and emboldens you. There is nowhere you can go but what he is there. Good evening, this is LinEL. I am delighted to be with you tonight. We are all here.

Lesson

Change, Healing

We have been enjoying your sharing with each other, letting each other see inside, learning to love, learning to care. I encourage you to continue this practice. There is so much that can come from it. We are very pleased with your progress. We know that changes are often difficult and I wish to speak with you a bit tonight about change, about the ebb and flow. We have been with you during the week, myself and your personal teachers, and of course, your angels always.

I know for many of you, this has not been an easy time. It is hard, because as mortals, you are so controlled by the electrochemical mechanism, particularly on your world where the rebellion caused the failure of correction. This struggle is natural. You will all experience it for some time to come. Even the mission cannot fix this difficulty. Some of you have been having difficulties with fears welling up. Understand that as we bring you to the morontia life, the work must be begun for addressing your past problems.

If you read your Urantia book, you will see in several locations in the life of our Michael where he refers to early childhood experiences. He does this for specific reason. There are some of you who do not need to take this journey. You will know when it is time if you do. There are others of you who must go through some unpleasant remembrances because we are exposing your mental processes to the light of love and as these things come forth, they are triggered in your minds as memories. We regret this, but it is a natural process which can be troublesome even on the mansion worlds. This is part of the remedial...part of the way in which we begin to make up to you for those things which did not function fruitfully in your early lives. Those of you who do not feel this necessity, please be patient with those who must go through it.

If you feel secure in the love of the Father, you will know that you can move forward. For those who are blocked, this remedy will be sometimes necessary, sometimes disturbing. Fears are always difficult. It is hard not to believe them. It is hard not to give them reality. It is hard to place them in the Father's hands, to realize that truly, you need not carry these burdens beyond the recognition of their meaning. As these fears come to you, try to recognize that this is a process which will pass. This is a process of cleansing and healing, and truly, you are held in the Father's grasp and no harm will come to you. When you feel it is a dark hour, try to remember that the Father is with you even in this and that the sun will come again.

His will for you is joy, that you shall go through your days in harmony and love, that you shall know laughter and peace, but this cannot come overnight. Even as we must affect your physical bodies in physical healing, also for some there will be these effects on your emotional-mental selves. Aside from these problems, there is the natural ebb and flow of mortal life, like the tides. All of you will come to this, this mission is only in its beginning stages. We are doing much experimentation. There will be many trials ahead. This is not said to alarm you, but only to let you know that as you each learn to lean upon each other in your times of troubles, so it will come the turn of each of you to lean, and also to support. This is part of why it is so important that you develop your family feeling together, so that you can take strength from each other and talk together as you have done tonight. And when it is one's turn, next time it will be another's, and together you will have the strength to move ahead, and to do the things that you will be asked.

I know that you have questions and this evening, I would like to in the interest of time, pause here and allow you time to ask some. Please forgive the stiffness of this transmission. It is unavoidable for the moment. Do you have questions?

Dialogue

Teaching Mission, Groups

Jules: Excuse me, yes. I was hoping you would address what is going to happen with the two groups now for Corvallis, if there are any plans.

LinEL: Yes, I can address this. What I would personally like to see...understand, this is my personal feeling...is that you continue for a few more weeks, perhaps half a dozen in this form and then establish another meeting time for a meeting to be open to all comers. Anyone who wishes to come. I would like to see you find a location for this that is suitable and I would like to see you continue this meeting as a place for those who are beginning to learn to transmit either for me or their personal teachers, to have a safe place. In order to do this, my preference would be that you decide by consensus, each expressing your comfort level, so that all feel comforted in any new member who asks to participate. I will not demand of you, of course, that you do any of these things, I am simply saying this would be my preferred way. Do you need more clarification?

Jules: Yeah, I'm kind of concerned for the Friday night at Terry and Marlene's, for those people.

LinEL: At this time it's advisable not to have the meeting in that location, however, the new open meeting established will certainly welcome all of them and I would hope deeply that they would come and participate.

Jules: So, are there any plans for you coming through another person or even another teacher coming?

LinEL: There is the possibility of another teacher, if this is what some members so choose. We always have many teachers waiting and eager as you can well imagine. This would be more than acceptable, however, I will not be returning at present to that particular format at this time. Perhaps there may be changes in the future.

Jules: Who is supposed to let them know this?

LinEL: Any who choose to do so, I would hope perhaps more than one. All who can welcome them, or any other to this new open meeting when it is established, the more who welcome, the better. This will allow me to practice my particular experiment in the manner that I would hope. Once again, I tell you, this is not mandatory. We all have our individual agendas here. We are all experimenting in these early stages of the mission. You will notice there are many differences in how groups are structured and how they function. You cannot truly compare one group with another because we have each been permitted to put into practice our own ideas to the extent that this is possible, in order to gain information on the best manner in which to approach the later stages of this entire teaching mission. This is why you will see different viewpoints and different methods presented. When things do not work as we anticipate, we will always try another way, but this is still a vast and exciting experiment for us. Does this serve to explain more fully?

Jules: It sounds like a patience thing.

LinEL: I'm afraid I must inform you that patience will indeed be a part for not only yourselves but also us in this entire mission for some time to come. Patience is, even to me, sometimes difficult. Patience, patience, and always patience! Yet this is the space which allows the unfoldment of the Father's will.

Barbara: I have a question. This is for clarification. Would you prefer that the new open meeting not meet here in this home? Is that what you said?

LinEL: No, that would be acceptable, however, I recognize that this can be a burden on one person and perhaps there might be advisabilities in finding some neutral territory, because this sometimes allows the participation of some who have personal discomforts.

Barbara: And you said something about not returning to some format. I didn't understand what that was about. Would you clarify that?

LinEL: I said that I would not return to Friday night at present as it has been in the past, at the location where it has been in the past, at the present time. If things change, then we also can change.

Jules: I'm also kind of wondering, because I know there are others that are willing to act as receiver, more than one person, and I didn't know why it would be held back.

LinEL: It is not a case of being held back, it is a case that there are other teachers and it is highly possible that at this point, another teacher would be more effective under the circumstances. We must also take these things into account. And we do indeed have many who are capable, therefore at this time, we would suggest this request and this approach, and if it does not end up being advisable, we will again alter our plans. Does this make sense?

Jules: I'm trying. Thank you.

LinEL: Please feel free to ask for further clarification. This is not a difficulty for me.

Jules: Part of it... I guess I'm confused at my own expectation of things and I realize that I don't know anything and I don't have a broad spectrum of everything that's going on and stuff. I think I just need to ponder.

LinEL: One thing that you will see in the Teaching Mission is that some teachers and some individuals are not as compatible as others. This is no fault on any side. It is simply how it is when personalities work with personalities. Also you will see that sometimes, people are initially distressed by things this Teaching Mission asks. Sometimes it takes time to adjust to the changes because the changes are truly tremendous. Those of you who are excited with this and embracing it in fullness, this is wonderful, but there are those for whom it is much more difficult and this is part of the patience of which I spoke. Everyone has their own time and their own pace. All are held in the hands of the Father. This is no shame on anyone's part, this is simply how it is. Persons bloom at their own rates, they bring their own histories and situations. There is nothing wrong with this, nothing wrong with them, it is simply the outworking of the natural differences in persons. Therefore, a variety of accommodations need to be made to make this the most fruitful that it can be made. Sometimes extra teachers are extremely beneficial. This is not the only group in which added teachers, group teachers initially, have been useful.

Jules: Thank you.

LinEL: Thank you for your questions. I know this is difficult to comprehend.

Jules: Yeah, and I try not to be argumentative. I don't feel argumentative but I feel I might sometimes come across as argumentative and then I rely on that you really know where I'm at.

LinEL: Julie, do not worry please. I have no difficulty whatsoever. I enjoy your presence, I enjoy your nature very much. I think you can relax. This is no problem.

Jules: Thank you.

LinEL: I am glad you are part of this.

Jules: Me, too.

LinEL: All of you, truly. All of you. We are so glad to be together. When we hear you share, from your hearts, as you have shared tonight, this is so heartening to us. This means so much, for you are understanding what it is that we want you to see, and you will take this into your lives and you will change things even as you are changed. This is the heart of the mission. We are very proud of you all.

Doug: Could you elaborate on what changes have occurred on the supernal side of things to change from limiting the size of the group to opening it up to everybody and anybody.

LinEL: This is largely a function of the changes in group dynamics under the present circumstances. There were difficulties which we knew from the outset might occur and although it was known to us, we still wanted to try and harmonize. Because of the tensions and dissensions that were present in the group, it was necessary to request that the size be limited to attempt to deal with those, to attempt to avoid extreme reactions. This did not come to pass as we would have hoped. However, we are always adaptable. Therefore, this format is closer to what I would have initially preferred but was not possible due to the group dynamics. Is this clearer?

Doug: It's a good, frank answer. Thank you.

LinEL: Understand, we have projected plans from long before our initial contacts with you and some experience of mortal behavior, therefore, much which surprises you is simply neither surprising nor disheartening to us. You must understand that all your worries for your friends are needless because all are in the Father's hands and they will truly find their places as the Father wills them to do. Their time may not be the time that you see it, but it will all come to pass and it will all work. It's easier for us to see that. We can only assure you that it is true.

Teacher Contact, Doubt

Jules: I have a question on a lighter subject.

LinEL: This always also acceptable! (Laughter)

Jules: Was that you last night when I actually tried to be serious?

LinEL: Tell me what you think yourself.

Jules: I don't know. Sometimes I get excited to where I think it's because I want it. Do you know what time I'm referring about?

LinEL: Yes, I do. Jules: At work?

LinEL: Julie, you are stumbling over your own feet. You are hearing much more than you have yet come to trust. If you relax in this, you will find many of my words present with you, as indeed my nudging was there on that occasion.

Jules: Because what I heard was, "Greetings, this is LinEL."

LinEL: This is a typical thing for me to say. (Laughter) You will find that I often initiate in this manner.

Jules: And that's why I didn't know, because I know it's what you do say. I didn't know if I made it up or if it was you or I wanted it to be you.

LinEL: You see, this process of learning to hear is a tremendous process of trust and faith and it's very difficult for you to overcome self-doubts. In this room are an entire group of people who are capable of receiving and transmitting and all of you will be presently going through the struggles of recognizing this. One of the reasons, Julie, that questions like yours are so helpful is so that all will come to understand that their experiences are not totally unique. This will be a tremendous comfort as each of you comes into this capability. For these doubts are part of the process. Remember that the doubts help to be a stabilizing function because they keep you from running away as you have spoken of with possibilities of ego, with possibilities of more extreme distortion than it is when it's corrected by doubt. This does not mean that you pay attention to the doubts. I'm trying to say that there is a balance of attention that you give to the doubts. Enough to prevent an extreme but not enough to stop trying. I wish you all to use the doubts only as a balance but try please to act in spite of them, to trust in spite of them. Doubt and move ahead. You have the statement from your planet, "I believe, help thou mine unbelief",(158:5.2) this is "I doubt, but I will move ahead despite my doubts." All of you will learn to do this, and the doubts will remain a part because they do provide you a reality testing principle. Do you understand?

Jules: I think so. I think it's like finally accepting that yes I really do have a private teacher.

LinEL: I think you could probably safely accept this, Julie.

Jules: Well, it's just that you know everybody else does but you don't think that you do, it's like well, am I feeling it right, okay, well why don't you just go with it and have the faith that you do.

LinEL: Everyone of you in this room has had a private teacher for some time.

Jules: Oh, dear.

LinEL: Yes. None of you need feel alone or lonely.

Jules: So, lonely and alone, nevermore. I don't know if we'll ever be alone anymore.

LinEL: You must question whether you ever were. You will find as I said last week, that the old feelings of loneliness will occur less and less in this process as the healing progresses, and you will come in time to know the comfort and the pleasantness of the companionship that you have surrounding you. It will not be a burden or a pressure to you, but a safe haven. It will come to pass. Bear with the difficulties and the pains and the fears. They will pass. I promise you.

Jules: Thank you.

Challenges, Adversity

Barbara: LinEL, would you be willing to speak a little bit about... I can't remember how you phrased it earlier, some of the difficulties you teachers are asking us to face in the process of going forward in the Teaching Mission.

LinEL: Yes, I would speak of this. Several that I can mention at this time. One is that as you progress, you will all be called upon to display the courage of your convictions in the face of rejection. This is unpleasant, but it is always the case of all who take up the teachings of Michael in earnest. This will come in a number of ways, some which will not be difficult for you, but for each there will be times when your own personal pains are triggered by this process. Understand that through this process, you will be healed of some of those difficulties so that you can be more effective and more fearless in your own teachings out in the world. You will also learn increasingly to work together with your brothers and sisters. You know already that this is not always easy, and I tell you there will be struggles in the future of this sort. Once again, when you have the shared values and goals of this mission, hopefully you will be able to resolve these issues, resolve these difficulties amongst yourselves in new and superior ways, but this will not happen overnight and there will be some instances where things will appear to you very difficult, perhaps even disastrous. From our viewpoint, this is not quite the same, but it will be painful. There are many challenges ahead. Some of them will be the challenges of belief, when things appear to have been promised and they do not occur. This has already occurred for some. There are many, many things. Do you have any specific concerns? Specific things that you yourself have thought of, that you yourself are wondering about?

Barbara: Oh, are you asking me?

LinEL: Yes.

Barbara: Oh, probably. What they might be elude me right now. Let me think a minute. This isn't quite it but I know that the issue of personal integrity and honesty comes to my mind often when I think about the Teaching Mission because when in my own life I feel so much more as though this were important. I mean I know it has always been important in our own lives, it always is, but it's as though I've gone up to another plateau in terms of how I present myself to the world, and to myself, for that matter, in terms of being forthright and honest and so forth. And that's very generic and general but perhaps you have some more things to say about that.

LinEL: Yes. Most who have committed themselves to this mission have indeed found this enhanced value leap, and this of course, does engender difficulties out in the world, it always has. Every time Michael's message is truly attempted... every time people truly attempt to live Michael's message on higher levels of integrity, higher levels of honesty, higher levels of dedication to truth, beauty, and goodness, there are those who respond with fear. It is not possible at this time, on this planet, with all of the disturbances, not to trigger this situation. This will indeed present you with challenges. However, I assure you there will be benefits beyond understanding at this time from the courage that it takes to live on this level. You already know this; you have already experienced some of this. You are all indeed experiencing tremendous growth. Sometimes this is even frightening, but it will even out up ahead.

Barbara: It is frightening, you know, to feel a leap of growth in the way that happens on occasion. One always leaves something behind, and whether that thing was good or worthy or healthy or not, still it's going somewhere new.

LinEL: Still, it was what you knew. It was what you understood. This is why I beg of you, please be patient with any who have difficulty and struggle with this growth and change. Not all grow and change at the same rate. Remember, each of those is loved equally by the Father, each of those has his own way to unfold, and those who are more frightened need your love increasingly, and when you yourselves are frightened, share with your brothers and sisters, receive their love, share with us, seek Michael, seek the Father, seek all the sources that can renew you and strengthen you in this process.

Delores: That must be part of the ebb and flow, and the cycles then, because it's like, watching children grow, or being children and growing, it's so amazing that we do that in such utter darkness and ignorance.

LinEL: Especially on a world such as this, Delores.

Fusion

Delores: I just feel so profoundly moved by what you just said because I miss my 15 year old when he was two! Barbara brought me her 2-year old grandchild to see and it was such a time-snap because it was like seeing my fifteen year-old then and..

LinEL: Remember, too, when you fuse with your Thought Adjuster, your memories of that will be vastly enhanced beyond anything you'll understand now, and this will become a part of your place. Your child when he was two will become part of your place, that you can visit forever. It will never be lost to you. Never, any of those precious moments, ever. This is part of the blessing of fusion.

Delores: But people don't have any understanding or hope about that.

LinEL: This is part of what you will teach them. This is part of what you will help teach them.

Disappointment, Perception

Delores: I was reading about Michael saying to the apostles he had trained them well in disappointments and he was sure that they could go out and teach now because they had been trained well in disappointments, and that seemed like the wrong way to do it to me.

LinEL: One must be trained in disappointments in the manner in which one understands that disappointments are really not disappointments, so that when what comes to you appears as you would have thought a disappointment in the past, you see the opportunity, you see the chance for growth, you see the chance for expansion and it no longer affects you as a disappointment, but only as a thrill and a challenge. This is what training in disappointment means. Does that make this clearer?

Delores: More! Not quite...

LinEL: In other words, it is a fact of human life as you have grown and learned on a mortal level to perceive difficulties, to perceive disappointments as being cuttings-off from hope. This is partly because as Agondonters, on a world where you do not have the contacts, those moments where you are receiving unseen comfort have not been felt. And so you have truly felt alone, you have truly been alone in comparison to the other worlds, and therefore, these experiences become more imbued with the shadow, with the pain. When you learn to live from the Father's will more fully, when these experiences happen, you see only what you can make of this, you see only perhaps a frustrating lump in your path but one you can step over, be lifted over by the Father's love, by the support that you have. In this way you can help teach your other brothers and sisters that these disappointments are not what they appear to be. You can help teach them the hope, you can help bring the light that will change their attitudes because truly this is an attitude. It is very difficult on a planet such as yours. This is an important part of the Teaching Mission. Training in disappointments is not training to be disappointed, but rather to change ones perception of disappointment. Is this clearer.

Delores: . .the difference.

LinEL: Yes.

Barbara: Consider the possibilities.

LinEL: Yes! Difficulties truly are only opportunities for growth. They can become thrilling when you are a child of the Father.

Delores: So the disappointments are... so what happens then are the joys. Like I was thinking, the cycles and the ebbs and flows - there's hard times and then it seems like I'd always get a little reward or something - I'd dream that I could fly , you know, something that would uplift me or have some real happy thing happen.

LinEL: You will find many times after the pain and the struggle, there will be the rewards, but I will also tell you that as you increasingly become linked hand in hand with your Adjuster, the ups and downs will even out until eventually you will experience no more struggle on this planet than you would on a normal world. This is more difficult here, but it can be done and you will be learning. This is part of what we are here to teach you so that you can take it out and teach others. We are together in an adventure here. I have said this before, but I never tire of this because you cannot begin to imagine the thrill of what we are going to share all of us. You are our friends. This is forever. Not just here. We are getting to know each other as personalities, and learning to function together. There are many thrills ahead and yes, some of these will be initially perceived as disappointments, pains, fears, frustrations, but in time you will learn, in time we will all walk together through high mountains with vast vistas of God's sunshine... I wish I could give you the image. We will see far together! We will go far together.

Jules: LinEL, I have to leave. I would like to thank you for your lesson tonight, and also for keeping it limited so I did have time to ask my questions. They were important to me, and just to say goodnight and continue on.

LinEL: Julie, I am glad you were here. I'm glad you could come.

Jules: Thank you. LinEL: You know that I am with you, I trust. Trust yourself. And I would ask also if there are no further questions that we close for this evening. Is this acceptable?

Doug: I have two quick questions.

LinEL: I am willing to take them.

Doug: Can we have an update on the number of teacher groups in the nation? It's been awhile since we've had a new number, and can we anticipate more formal lessons.

LinEL: One moment...... I cannot give you an exact number at the time. We have a number in transition. It is on one level of counting similar to the last number which I spoke, it depends on which you take into account. We are having lots of transitions. I would say to you however that the mission is growing satisfactorily and we are pleased. pause. Would you please repeat the second part of your question.

Doug: If we could anticipate more formal lessons instead of all question and answer which is a little un...(unclear)

LinEL: Yes, I realize that this is a problem for some, however for this evening because of transmission difficulties, this was a suitable format. Please be patient and I will have an opportunity as things settle in to continue my more formal teachings. I would ask you please to be patient under the circumstances.

Doug: It's been a fine format - questions and answers - at an initial stage, I was just comparing some of Ham and Rayson where it's a good focused subject.

LinEL: I will tell you that it is my personal teaching preference to have a combination and that I will continue with regularity to have at least some question and answer period. The reason that I do this is to encourage your participation because eventually when this group is filled with transmitters, we will be doing a good bit of discussion amongst ourselves and this accustoms you to all speaking together, so there are purposes here for which I do this. But there will be more formal teaching. Thank you for your questions.

Closing

I will for this evening say goodbye. But know that that goodbye is illusory, for I am with you, your teachers are with you, your angels are with you, Michael is with you, the Melchizedeks are supervising this entire enterprise, and the Father you always have, above, and in your hearts. This is forever! You are all held in the Father's grasp. Know that we are with you during your week. When the doubts surface, we are there, the Father is there. These things will pass. I love you all. Farewell.